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December 23, 2017

'YOU'LL BLEED OUT BEFORE ANY HELP ARRIVES'

Lowell police urge shovel-wielding residents not to challenge snowplows

(Thanks to Ralph)

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In winter, my bike ride would meet a snowplow at some point after the &&#@*/ fell. We worked out that he would take his coffee break until I went past. I was a part of the new guy training.

We call winter Mailbox Season with a betting pool as to who gets the next “it was like that when I got here” shrug. It’s a 50-50 split.

Good to know.

Also, you'll poke your eye out.

I'm thinking Stephen King ghosted this article for the Lowell Police Department. Kids reading this will have nightmares of encountering a snowplow for years.

I was cruisin' with my shovel late one night
When a snowplow pulled up on the right
He rolled down the window of his shiny new truck
And challenged me then and there try my luck

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