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September 08, 2017

AS AN ANXIOUS WORLD WATCHES

Berlin court rules on whether farting next to a police officer is allowed

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker and Ralph)

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Only if you're not a sour Kraut.

You have the right to remain silent. Anything gas you pass can be used against you.

Now people can fart in their general direction and laugh. And laugh.

"You ahr oonder ahrest. Vut ees your name?"
"Hoover, officer."
"Hoover? Is zat your first or last name?"
"First, officer."
"Und vut is your last name?"
"Smeltitdealtit, sir."

Intent is 9/10 of the law.

"How dare you break wind before me!"

"I'm sorry baby, I didn't know it was your turn."

In the USA, this would be protected speech. Or some kind of performance art.

Oder in the court!

Would this be classified as attempted assault with a silent but deadly weapon?

Indeed K. My cousin Mark thought me the true meaning of SBD. I suppose if he were my Uncle Clair he might have worked out a scenario where he could ask me to pull his finger. In that case I guess we would all just have to "wait for it..."

Yep, it's ok, as long as you can prove you have a medical condition that makes it impossible for you to control...
oh, wait....they're gonna need a bigger jail!

There's a filipino prison where the inmates dance to Michael Jackson's Triller, among other tunes, as a form of creative exercise. They have a huge courtyard for this. Of course you all know that already. I must be getting tired...

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