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July 29, 2017

OR IN STANDARD POLICE RADIO CODE, A 10-2038

Ohio woman calls 911 saying, 'I have a boa constrictor stuck to my face'

(Thanks to Rick Day, Le Petomane and John Lobert)

Comments

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I believe nail polish remover is the accepted antidote to Superglue.

What?

She rescued two boa constrictors? Why? If I'd been the paramedic on that call I probably would have told the police to just shoot it. I can deal with a gunshot wound much better than I can deal with a snake. Especially a big snake.

Hey, that was my pick up line in college.

I have never been able to understand why people have pet snakes. You can buy a snakeskin wallet or boots, ETC for Pete's sake.
There's really no need to grow them at home.

I like McGyver solutions

Rescued? Snakes? Does that mean she found them under some "oppressive rocks"?

Snake lady one crazy bitch--old Native American saying (I think)

Croc nose defines shark butt. Ha

Oops wrong thread.

Firefighters should know enough to use a CO2 fire extinguisher on the snake. If the freezing blast doesn't make it let go, it will make it torpid enough to pry off. Of course, that way you don't get Boa Constrictor for dinner.

This species is noted for its appetite.

Haha

Ralph, maybe they didn't want to spray the lady with the CO2 extinguisher?
When I was a paramedic, in addition to being an e.r. nurse, we always made the firefighters do the grunt work. We also liked trying to make the young volunteer firefighters throw up. There was an incidence once that involved a bowl of spaghetti and I had two of them heaving in the back yard. A good day!
btw, firemen are the best. They do a job I could never do and I appreciate them all.

The full 9-1-1 transcript:

Oh, I'm being eaten
By a boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor,
I'm being eaten by a boa constrictor,
And I don't like it--one bit.
Well, what do you know?
It's nibblin' my toe.
Oh, gee,
It's up to my knee.
Oh my,
It's up to my thigh.
Oh, fiddle,
It's up to my middle.
Oh, heck,
It's up to my neck.
Oh, dread,
It's upmmmmmmmmmmffffffffff . . .

-Shel Silverstein

"And now she’s going to have to make a decision on whether she continues to do this,”

Or switch to something safer, like bats or scorpions.

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