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May 02, 2017

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Saturday is World Naked Gardening Day.

Semi-NSFW.

(Thanks to Stan Ruth)

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Please celebrate responsibly. Which, for most of us, means "with your clothes on."

It'll make it easy to check each other out for ticks.

To paraphrase Santa, 'Hoe, hoe, hoe'

Okay, for you loyal readers and avid gardeners out there: I participated in WNGD last year, and it didn't go well. I planted several rows of petunias, some geraniums, and a few impatiens, all while wearing nothing but sunscreen.
Here's what I learned:
- Despite your best efforts, you will miss some critical areas with the sunscreen.
- You will get dirt in places that do not like dirt.
- And finally, no matter how beautiful the flowers look, and how well you think you've arranged them, you'll find the White House front lawn security staff have no sense of aesthetics (nor humor, for that matter). Oh, and they don't accept the fact that you don't have an ID on you, even though it's PAINFULLY OBVIOUS YOU DON'T HAVE POCKETS!

My garden is always naked; the vegetables never like the designer outfits the ones at the Met Gala wear.

Be careful when spraying pesticides!

I'll be tending to my jack-in-the-pulpit.

Wiredog & Stix win the Internet. As for me, it will be Gardening in a Blindfold Day -- I don't want to see myself....

I did this last year. My wife said it was a week before any birds had the courage to return to the feeder so I'll pass this year.

Learn whether it's not just your neighbor's thumb that's green.

Nice try, Dave.

I live in a 55-and-over community. God help me if my neighbors find out about this.

Let me show you where to plant tulips..

Now I can't say, "Those are great melons !" without getting slapped by the neighbor lady......

In Minnesota, this is obviously being promoted by the National Association for the Advancement of Mosquitos.

It wasn't last Saturday? That explains all the ruckus. Although not specified, you should only do this in your own garden

♫ I went to a garden party
They all seemed to stare
Finally someone shouted
You forgot your clothes even your underwear!

Well it's alright now
They locked me a cell,
and gave me a orange jumpsuit
and an old clanky cowbell!

You can't please everyone,
so you've got to please yourself
Just don't do it in public
or any jail cell...♫

I wear my pink pajamas in the summer when it's hot
I wear my long red woolies in the winter when it's not.
And sometimes in the springime and sometimes in the fall
I jump out in the garden with nothing on at all.

Snork@ funny man!

AKA Throw Up In Your Mouth Day.

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