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April 03, 2017

WE MISUNDERSTOOD THIS HEADLINE

New class in Thunder Bay teaches cat first aid

It turns out they're not teaching first aid to the cat.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Comments

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My cat would not give me first aid even if properly trained. She would just stare and probably think it is very funny when I choke on a piece of popcorn. And by the way, how can a cat give me the Heimlich Maneuver?

Qaz, staring is Step 1. Step 2 is what cats call "YAWA": yawn and walk away.

I believe nursecindy's cat is adept at first aid already.

And if those trained cats go on tour with Meatloaf, will is be bandaid?

Step 1: Observe cat choking. Step 2: Observe cat hawking up hairball. Step 3: Pretend you observed nothing and hope someone else cleans it up.

"Swaddling involves using a towel and then wrapping your cat up like a burrito,' she said."

Do you add the sauce before or after?

Real life cat care:
(1) Attempt to catch cat for her yearly shots
(2) Later that day successfully catch cat.
(3) Attempt to stuff cat into carrier
(4) Call wife to help stuff cat into carrier.
(5) Deliver sweetie to vet.
(6) Stop by Quick Care on the way home for tetanus booster and antibiotics for cat owner.
(7) Vow to ask mother-in law to take cat to vet next year.

"Swaddling involves using a towel and then wrapping your cat up like a burrito," she said. "It makes them feel secure."
The last time I tried this on my cat Ozzie, I ended up with a scratched cornea and had to wear an eyepatch for a week.

Our cat wants me to chase her. She won't give cpr.

Noticed they left out dealing with cat vomit.
(Commenting for a friend.)

Ralph, check with Alf for the best time to add sauce.
Nursecindy, was it talk like a pirate day? Arrrrrrr.

Sad but true: My cat gets pumpkin and Miralax mixed in with his wet food, and I slice open a cod liver oil capsule to insert his Prozac and Pepcid. Tuna and treats then go with this, in the hopes he will deign to consume the pill. Most days it works. And as gross as it sounds, it is easy to clean up the cat puke from the carpet (or elsewhere) if you let it dry completely. Then scrape it up and vacuum. Now you know what's under the paper towels on my floor...
After all this I do for him, you can bet he'd make a point of skipping the first aid class just to spite me.

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