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March 26, 2017

I'M SORRY, DAVE; YOU ALREADY TOOK TWO SQUARES

Anti-theft toilet paper dispenser with facial recognition technology

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

Comments

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If Jacob shows up, pants him and hang him upside down from a Beijing Temple of Heaven fence.

Who was that masked man?

If you look really, explosively distressed and puke on it, does it spit out more? Is there a stink sensor?

There must be a better way to take a sheet.

sheet faced

Sheet happens.

Didn't wee cover this in the last week or two?

Just for good measure, wear a disguise.

How valuable or in short supply is toilet paper in China that a dispenser with facial recognition is cost effective? Sorry, I know, cost doesn't enter into it. Some bureaucrat in the Toilet Directorate has just GOT to control the toilet paper usage of others. Too bad Mao couldn't have gotten a job there instead of as a revolutionary. We could have had "The Great Wipe Forward".

Oh, I got something that security system can memorize, RIGHT here...

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