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December 30, 2016

WORST. YEAR. EVER.

Here's my review of 2016.

Comments

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Is it possible to read the column without a Miami Herald subscription?

Gee, that was even more depressing than I'd remembered.

Thanks, Dave!

Brilliant.

2016: the year when satirical embellishment is unnecessary.

We have a late sweepstakes entry!

And then he notices the camera.

It just kept getting weirder and weirder.

Another wonderful Year In Review! It's too bad most of it is true. The illustrations are also amazing. As good as the current ones are, I still miss Jeff MacNelly's illustrations.

Great job Dave!
(somewhat related)
I just read the sneak review of the cable AHC (AKA: the ALL HITLER CHANNEL) Year in Review, which clams the the whole thing was an alien induced hypnotic trance. As proof they disclose the nationwide disappearance of all two prong electric extension cords from Home Depot stores.

It's good to know that you clarified this for us.

At least it can't get any worse. Oh wait,there's still tomorrow and a leap second to go yet.

Well played.

Good Job. I enjoyed all of your political escapades delivering the news.

I like to imaging that hundreds of years from now all other records have been somehow destroyed, and the only knowledge historians have about this era are is from these year in review articles.

I agree with Couch Surfer. These years in review by Dave should be put in a space capsule and sent into the farthest reaches of the universe so that intelligent life will know what earth is like.

Dave left out one important diplomatic achievement of 2016 which bears mention. And it's important because there have been no diplomatic achievements coming out of Washington in 2016, or for that matter since 2007. Unless, of course, you count the number of times Obama has pronounced Netanyhu. Net'n'yahoo. In recent days, after ordering the Arabs and Jews to get along after three thousand years of wars, the White House announced in it's most harshly worded diplomatic memorandum tone so far this year, it’s going to settle this Roadrunner-Coyote thing.

I'm still processing Lemmy's demise, let alone the debacle that was 2016.

The best phrase: wingtip knee pads

The replay between you and Hiaasen is priceless.

Another sign of the End Times, a radio station calling itself 98.7 Donald-FM has debuted in Tampa. Nothing but music about money. http://987donaldfm.com/

In all sincerity, thanks, Dave. Sometimes laughing is the best way to cope and no one's writing makes me laugh quite like yours.

Great Year In Review, Dave!

One thing we have to look forward to next year: 24 starts again! But without Jack Bauer. Or Edgar. Upside - no Audrey.

Meanwhile world tension mounts when satellite imagery reveals that North Korea has positioned an 18-story plastic bottle containing an estimated 40 million liters of Diet Coke on the border with South Korea, and has somehow obtained what one military analyst describes as “Mentos mints the size of barns.”

Heh. Clearly, Dear Leader is a fan of Mythbusters.

This is one of the great traditions that connect us as a nation, and it serves to remind us that, although we disagree on many things, we are all part of the same big family — the American family — and when all is said and done, we hate each other.

And the reader comments below the YiR prove that conclusion, in spades. >_<

Sheesh. Some people are just wound too tight.

Well, as "worst year" evaluations go, I suppose 2016 has nothing on 1348, though we may have a heightened sense of this being a particularly "bad" year for its many celebrity deaths. On that count it was bad for more than just celebrities, though it's probably not good to think of these things in terms of the loss of our entertainment heroes. That said, I love Dave's annual review, and especially his take on our often bizarre political escapades.

Well done, again.

Best phrase: Ointment vs. Suppository.

Runner-up: "If the airlines didn’t keep selling tickets, we wouldn’t have all these people showing up at airports trying to catch flights." It's almost hard to argue with that.

Happy and Safe New Year to everyone!

And the reader comments below the YiR prove that conclusion, in spades. >_<

Sheesh. Some people are just wound too tight.

I agree with Spiny Norman. I doubt we'll see many more mean comments though. Right now the National Coalition For The Prepetually Offended, NCFTPO, is too busy crucifying Steve Martin for having the audacity to say that Carrie Fisher was a beautiful woman.
I did give a snarky answer back to one of the commenters that mentioned something about the election. I normally don't do things like that but, nobody and I mean nobody, messes with Dave when I'm around. I'm also extending that to include Steve Martin.
Here's hoping that 2017 is not only a much better year but also a year in which the NCFTPO cannot find anything that offends them.

It was a sucky year -- but having you memorialize it makes it a tiny bit better, Dave, and that's saying something. Thanks and God bless! May 2017 give you some happy stuff to joke about, instead!

There is no way that everything Dave says happened in 2016 really happened. Clearly, the Herald was hacked by North Korea. Or Samsung. Or Debbie Whatshername Schultz.

(Outstandingly funny, Dave).

Brilliant as always. My favorite line is:

"Meanwhile the Clinton campaign is dealing with a steady stream of WikiLeaks emails suggesting that the Clinton Foundation is dedicated to humanitarian relief in the same sense that the Soprano family was dedicated to waste management."

Dave, it was too easy.

Key quote where the truth is hidden:

In the month’s biggest non-election news, the death of Fidel Castro is greeted with expressions of sorrow from several dozen world leaders who never had to live under his rule, and tears of happiness from many thousands of Cubans who did.

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