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June 04, 2014

HE'S GOING TO RUN OUT OF SPACE

Dean McDermott tattoos Tori Spelling's wedding vows on his rib cage

But note: Dean's new tattoo may not be enough to convince his wife of his dedication to her, however, as the former 'Beverly Hills, 90210' actress has previously revealed that an inking of her name above his penis didn't stop him from being unfaithful in the past.

(Thanks to The Perts)

*EVEN IF YOU ARE FEMALE.* THAT'S HOW STRONGLY THE CITY OF TORONTO FEELS ABOUT THIS.

The City of Toronto wants you to wear its edgy, branded condoms

(Thanks to The Perts)

NOW, MORE THAN EVER, DAD NEEDS IT

The Laser-Guided Tactical Necktie.

(Thanks to Suzie Q. Wacvet)

EVEN CLASSIER THAN PLASTIC FLAMINGOS

Tennessee man builds life-size dinosaur park in backyard

(Thnaks to Bill Hudgins)

GIMME THAT OLD-TIME RELIGION

Gospel music drives North Carolina woman to ax stepfather in the head

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

IN THAT CASE, MA'AM, WE WILL HAVE THE ALLEGED PERPETRATOR SHOT

Unhappy ice-cream customer dials 999 to complain there's not enough sprinkles on her cone: 'It doesn't seem like an emergency but it is'

(Thanks to Jan in Grimsby)

IT WAS A LOT OF FUN UNTIL THE EXPULSIONS WERE ANNOUNCED

Mariachi band follows head teacher for the whole day in hilarious high school prank

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

ROLE MODELS OF THE WEEK SO FAR

One man hit another while newly graduated kindergarten students were celebrating with punch and cookies, triggering a melee that involved up to 20 people and resulted in the lockdown of an elementary school near Cincinnati, authorities said Tuesday.

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

AND HUGH HEFNER WANTS THEM BACK

World's Oldest Pair of Pants Found

(Thanks to Sharon [The Minx] Lurie)

INSERT YOUR HOSE JOKE HERE

A Pennsylvania man has been accused of sneaking into a fire department and taking a woman on a 30-minute joyride in a fire truck.

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

 

THERE IS NO GOOD REASON FOR THOSE THINGS TO BE IN CIVILIAN HANDS

Texas woman accused of assault with catfish

(Thanks to Ralph)

ITS NATURAL HABITAT: WASHINGTON

This Newly Discovered Fish Has an Anus Behind Its Head

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

 
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