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February 28, 2014

CSI: INDIA

Parrot Helps Cops Solve Murder Mystery

(Thanks to Steve @ Secret Location and plhubbard)

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The stool pidgeonparrot sang to the cops.

Give that bird a cracker

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables, and when he picked up a Blu-Ray player to place in his pack, a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark saying, "Jesus is watching you."

He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight out, and froze. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head, promised himself a vacation after the next big score, then clicked the light on and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard,

"Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shone his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?", he hissed at the parrot.

"Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you."

The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?"

"Moses," replied the bird.

"Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?"

"The kind of people that would name a Rottweiller Jesus."

Polly wants a Witness Relocation.

Actually, this bird is better used to interrogate and get answers from female criminals, hence the term 'Polly wants to cracker her'

India, much like Murder She Wrote and Matlock, stole that plot from Perry Mason.

That's the problem with modern society -- too many single parrots.

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