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October 31, 2013

WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE PROBLEM?

Man calmly walks into hospital with 10 inch knife buried in his skull

(Thanks to Jeffrey Brown)

Comments

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Are we sure it wasn't just his Halloween costume?

It may have been a '10" knife,' and it may have been "buried into his skull," but not all ten inches were buried.

Come on, walk it off.

This brings "released against medical advice" to a whole new level.

sum ting wong . . .


Who lunged at Ho Lung ?
Who'd Ho know? Hu nu who!?!
He, who Ho knew, how wrong - how long!
Oh No, Ho - sum ting wong, so say so long

"It was just a silly mistake and it could have happened to anybody."

I don't think so, Tim.

an accident, sure.

A ten-inch fruit knife?
What kind of fruit was he defending himself from?

A 10-inch one, Steve ...

All I can think of are jokes about the guys who bash beer cans against their heads, but it's not really going anywhere.

"Painless home lobotomy kit?" His aim was off, if that was it.

Dunno, Omni, the bottom x-rays seem to put him pretty close, unlike the images at the top. Something odd here...

When I was a young man, his father replied,
I feared it might injure the brain.
But now that I'm perfectly sure I have none,
I do it again and again.

ER pro tip,

when going into the ER with an obvious problem (missing limbs, bone sticking out, knife in head) put on a calm, relaxed demeanor. This works because ER admitting personnel are trained to ask themselves as the first question "is this person going to die in the next five minutes without treatment?" This works because if you appear to be unconcerned they assume you are in shock and cannot give reliable answers to whether you are going to die in the next 5 minutes so they cut you in line to a professional who can make that assessment.

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me....

When I lived in DC [murder capitol USA] my roomy accidently put his foot thru the glass coffee table.
You have never seen that much blood all over the living room, wee.

So off to DC General ER in a cab.

We get to intake , they look at it and send us to the back bench. The room is full of big-azz knife wounds and bullet sprays, blood all the haell over the place, dudes actually near death. We wait for three hours. Mental note, if you need an exciting vacation spot, DC General is it!

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