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July 10, 2013

STEP ONE: CONSIDER TAKING A LOOK BEHIND THE BOAT

How to reverse a boat

(Thanks to Jan in Grimsby)

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Carnival cruise Lines may soon have an opening for the harbor pilot...He's just a little dingy.

This happened in Norway, not Cyprus. Ships have no brakes; by the time you realize something is wrong it may be too late. Try doing a three-point turn in a car without using your brakes, and discovering that when you shift into forward and put your foot on the gas, nothing happens. I'm sure there was some colorful language involved, including "Full Fart!" which is Norwegian for "Full Speed!"

"Hey Sven, you feel a little bump dere?"

Hey Sven!

Big Boat = large turning radius!

I saw this on another blog, and that story said the ship had "a broken propeller", which it manifestly did not have, since there was a huge amount of prop wash (that's an aircraft term, I know, but it describes this situation perfectly) visible. Maybe they meant "broken rudder."

Journalists seem to know as little about ships as they do about firearms. Some bozo at New Scientist referred to an Austrailian light cruiser as a "battle cruiser"; he was roundly mocked by the readership. (Readership, get it? Haw!)

What hath God yacht?

This is the tugboat driver's fault. All those boats are in his blind spot.

I like the guy on deck looking off like he doesn't notice anything unusual.

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