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May 07, 2013


Someone sent Ralph Polnicky a threatening dildo -- and now he wants to get his hands on the culprit.

(Thanks to Ron G.)


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I saw Threatening Dildo open for Pussy Riot in St. Petersburg.

He was the lead singer for Flaming Poo On The Porch.

Why would someone send someone else a threatening dildo and then not only sign it but put their workplace name on it? btw, I think the Threatening Dildos opened for Blondie in '76.

Somehow the "cold dead hands" line doesn't work here.

Threatening dildo? Sounds like one of those top secret "enhanced interrogation techniques." You know, like waterboarding and unlubricated butt plugs.

I'm betting Madonna was involved.

Didn't they open for Dido, before she laid an egg during the Grammy awards a few years ago?

Would "emotional damages," include laughing until a rib cracks?

I saw Threatening Dildo open for The Buzzcocks

I dont see hoe Ralph Polnicky would be a good name for a rock band

Ralph: Can I help you, ah, Sir?

Dildo: Nice place you got here. Too bad if something happened to it, you know.

"Now, he wants the culprit to be fired, which is putting him at odds with his wife."

...who wants to invite the culprit over for dinner.

"Oh my! I didn't know they can get that big. Ralph, why isn't yours this big? What are you going to do with it now? Here, I'll 'get rid of it' for you. Now, run off to work, dear."

I have friends who call that foreplay.

Do I get to make another Walter Fagen/Donald Becker reference here? No? OK, I'll check back.

I saw threatening dildo open for Supertramp.

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