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May 01, 2013

MEANWHILE IN CANADA

Saskatoon police say they have safety concerns about a man with no arms who was caught driving without wearing a seatbelt.

(Thanks to The Perts)

WE HOPE THEY WEREN'T BURNED

Festival-Goers Consume 110 Pounds of Testicles

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

ALWAYS GET THE GOOD STUFF

Carpet cleaner’s testicles were burned by 99p shower gel

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

ALWAYS AN EFFECTIVE LEGAL STRATEGY

Ghanaian urinates in court over N550,000 theft charge

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

IT NEVER GETS OLD

Lady Mavs beat Beavers

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

WHICH IS EXACTLY WHY WE *HAVE* POLICE

St. Pete man calls 911 and asks cops to bring him Kool-Aid and drugs

(Thanks to Corey "I'm proud to be a Floridian" Smith and R&L Stevenson)

SO THE GOOD NEWS IS, YOU DON'T HAVE TO SEE IT

Artist uses stubble to make world’s smallest sculpture

(Thanks to DaninTustn)

ROLE MODEL OF THE WEEK SO FAR

'Teen Mom' Farrah Abraham says she's ‘happy’ with sex tape sale, looks forward to ‘completing my Master’s degree’

(Thanks to jon harris)

CLASSY

NYC Realtor Offers Employees Pay Raise For Getting Tattoo Of Company Logo

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins and The Perts)

PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER

The horny, freezing, exploding wood frog

(Thanks to W. von Papineau)

IT WAS ADVISED OF ITS RIGHTS, THEN TASERED

Memphis Police Officer Hits Pole

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

SCIENCE

Antibiotic Protects Men from Attractive Women

(Thanks to Loudmouth)

CAREER ADVICE OF THE DAY SO FAR

Lean In and Poop at the Office, Already

(Thanks to Loudmouth)

JAPAN: LAND OF FASHION

Teenagers dye their hair red and green to look like ripe tomatoes

Article-2317460-1990587E000005DC-470_634x354

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson and DaninTustin)

CSI: LANCASHIRE

Police snap fugitive kangaroo crossing road in Lancashire… but it could be a wallaby

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, who saw Fugitive Kangaroo open for the Bee Gees.)

ATTENTION, CONSUMERS

Website Allows Users To Rate Prostitutes

(Thanks to Mark Schlesinger)

WHEW

So far, the great tit has coped with climate change

(Thanks to Omniskeptic)

YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN THERE'S GOING TO BE A SHORTAGE

300 gallons of urine found in home

(Thanks to Suzie Q. Wacvet, Ron G., R & L Stevenson and Jeff Meyerson)

APOCALYPSE UPDATE

The caterpillar that looks just like property mogul Donald Trump

Article-2317145-198D5145000005DC-138_634x476

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

THERE IS NOTHING LEFT TO BELIEVE IN

Can New Jersey possibly be the safest state?

(Thanks to Ross from New Jersey)

CUSTOMER OF THE WEEK SO FAR

A Mexican official's daughter has caused a scandal by sending inspectors to shut down a restaurant that did not give her the table she wanted.

(Thanks to Ron G.)

 
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