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April 12, 2013

DUH

Author of breasts study: more research needed

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

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Full and open competition is required for any research grants.

The true object of any study is to get grant money to continue the study. More research will be conducted in the nearest breastaurant.

I am so in the wrong line of work.

What would we blog ladies do without Allen at Division looking out for our breast health? I'm beginning to think French scientist Jean-Denis Rouillon and Allen at Division are the same person.

I just KNEW it. Back to the lab!

Remember the 60's and Jane Fonda in the epic reaseach study film Rebel Without a Bra. I don't either.

More research for what ? Do they need to tweak the results ?

I feel for them, or I'm willing to feel them.

I'd just like to say that I'm fully available to help further this noble scientific endeavor.

"... there was no disimprovement in the orientation of their breasts, and in fact, there was widespread improvement."

There is either a vast amount of detail and complex meaning underlying that statement, or there is none whatsoever.

Oui, oui. Any blog ladies wanting to volunteer to help further the cause of science can email me their relevant photos or set up patient consultation appointments. :)

I dunno. Seems a little unseemly. A study like this could be misused. I'll have to study it more closely.

Fund the study with dollar bills.

Back in my heyday (as in the late 70s) my OBGYN would walk in the room and go right to where my clothes were to make sure I had my giant 34DDD, $42.00 underwire bra from hell hanging there. I so wanted a breast reduction and he said it wasn't hurting my posture so I didn't need one. I couldn't wear cute little tops or any bathing suit at all, because they didn't make them for Busty Heart back then. (Look her up -- I could almost relate to her, but would have shot myself if it was that bad.)

Point is, I always wanted little itty bitty titties and every girl I knew wanted mine. Got ogled by every guy and hated it.

As for the bra, or lack thereof, thing, I still wear those golram giant underwire monsters and I can't say it's made any difference at all, gravity-wise. But the first thing I do when I walk in the door every night is rip that MFer off me.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...

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