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March 15, 2013


One driver eating a sandwich and another looking for a cell phone dropped on the floor of his vehicle hit head-on in Spring Lake Township on Tuesday afternoon, causing serious damage but no life-threatening injuries.

(Thanks to Elizabeth Listello)


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A Stoner of a story.

His cell phone was ringing because Siri was trying to advise him of the impending crash.

Isn't this how Reese's Cups were invented?

So this morning I was third in line waiting to turn left at the lights. Lights changed. A deadhead coming the opposite way had his right indicator on while he was obviously doing life-saving cellphone stuff. We waited. And waited. And waited. The drivers ahead of me took their chances and turned left. I sat on my horn and gave the guy the appropriate gesture. He failed to see the problem. He's on my list.

"I've got a little list, they'll surely not be missed."

I'm introducing a bill in Congress that will immediately outlaw both cell phones and sandwiches.

My guess is he wasn't eating the sandwich, but looking for his cell phone in it.

I just want to live in Fruitport Township on Fruitport Road! What a great name!

At last natural selection is beginning to kick in.

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