IN CASE YOU THOUGHT 2013 WOULD BRING PEACE TO FLATHEAD COUNTY

2:31 a.m. A Columbia Falls man reported that he ran into an owl and, at the time of the call, it was still alive and stuck in the grill of his truck. He wanted it documented that he did not intentionally try to kill the bird.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Comments

[Not My Usual Alias]

4:01 p.m. The owner of a dog that was chasing a UPS truck reportedly told the driver that he would first sue him then murder him if he were to run over his dog.

It's good to know that the owner of the dog has thought this through. Killing first would mean that the claim would have to go through probate.

[Omniskeptic]

So 'ere's to you, Fuzzy-Wuzzy,
In your 'home in Flathead County.
You're a poor benighted 'heathen,
And enough to scare a Mountie.

'e's a darlin', 'e's a duckie, 'e's a lamb.
'e's an Injia-rubber ijiot on a spree.
'e's the only thing that doesn't give a damn
For a regiment of British infantree!

Ol' Rudyard (at this hour of the morning?)

[MikeyVA]

Who?

[Omniskeptic]

Kipling.

[Loudmouth]

That's a hoot. (no nothing better)

[Meanie the Blue]

*Wonders whether the Mayans ever lived in Flathead County*

[Steve]

"A Splendid View Drive resident reported that his cantankerous neighbor threatened him with a declaration of “war” and warned that he would “fire back” if he shot his rifle off one more time."
Is this North Miami or South?

[LeDud]

9:40 a.m. An Evergreen man lost his tools.

...and he lost his mind...at the FlatCopa.....(stops before bricks start)

Whoa to Omni. Can we request your next inspiration ? How about Poe and THE RAVEN ?

[mazar larry]

Check the next issue, which includes this report- "Someone called 911 to report that a vehicle covered in inflated condoms was driving in a reckless fashion down Highway 2."

[max]

"Do you like Kipling?"

"I don't know, I've never kipled."

[MikeyVA]

max,

I Kippled once.

Won't ever do it again.

[Ralph]

A few days ago a skunk was hit in the road and a dispatcher told a local cop it was still "10-1" -- in service. I never heard if or how it became 10-2. I suspect a cop would rather deal with an owl. Sometimes the long arm of the law isn't long enough.

[Suzy Q (the original)]

Steve, there's no threatening in any part of Miami. We shoot first and then blame the other guy.