« Previous | Main | Next »

January 08, 2013

'I FOUND HIM IN BED WITH A NAKED CHICK. WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?'

She urinated on the carpet outside the master bedroom, defecated on the kitchen floor, grabbed a second rifle and started destroying Christmas decorations and other things.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Comments

Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

Has she never heard the old saying, "Don't sh defecate where you eat"?

And who could blame her?

Not even a question of guessing the state

Up until the part where she grabbed the rifle, I thought you were talking about my cat!

Shoddy journalism -- what color was the carpet?

I admire the woman. It takes amazing control and skill to urinate and defecate in two different spots. It might be just me but I'd have done everything outside the master bedroom and there would I be when I got to the kitchen? Then again, I do lack the foresight typical of the truly vengeful.

Aphorism update: The way to a man's heart is not through your bladder and colon.

Excellent, PirateBoy.

[voice=Tim from Holy Grail] Ralph, the carpet was...yellow? [/voice]

P.B., resident feline was my first thought too. O/T Did Jeff get a new initial for Xmas?

Takes "dumping" to a whole new level.

Jan in Grimsby, he had one too many on New Year's Day and developed a temporary stutter.

Two year olds are growing up too fast these days.

Jan, I think my smartphone was not too smart on that. I noticed the added letter too.

I'm sure the divorce is amicable because I sure wouldn't want to see her when she's mad.

Jeff. An extra 'J.' may seem a small issue. However, when my to-be hubby and I went to the British Embassy in Muscat, Oman to book our wedding, the Vice-Consul (snork) had a melt-down when I tried to explain that to-be Canadian hubby's middle name was the letter J. Took numerous phone calls and visits to clarify the situation. Could well have, 20+ years later, still be living in sin.

The comments to this entry are closed.

-
 
Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | Copyright | About The Miami Herald | Advertise