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January 24, 2013


Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates

(Thanks to Ralph, C Jon Johnson and Jan Crozier)


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we have a winner

Key quote: From there, things finally start to get weird

Three warning shots seems like a bit of overkill.

Sounds like an Olympic event.

Only if it's TIMED, Loud. Doh't you read the rules?
(Yeah, I know. But it was an accident and it fit this story better).

Let him who has not done these things, in the same order, cast the first stone.

I figured his finale would involve illicit relations with a snowman.

Well, he was bored. He had already done his taxes, changed the oil in the couple's minivan and mowed their lawn since he got from working at the local Starbucks.

"Where's my checklist? I know I had it here someplace. Where are my PANTS?!"

Did I read correctly that the couple stores multiple guns in their son's bedroom? What could possibly go wrong?

I'm surprised he didn't try to shovel their driveway.

Florida the land of enchantment.

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