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December 08, 2012

GUESS THE COUNTY

Sometime during the night a canoe in Kila went missing.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

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"It was a dark and stormy night. Somewhere, a canoe was missing."

See if Daniel Day-Lewis has an alibi.

- to the tune of 'the 12 days of Christmas'

...a-hem...

'On the 7th of December, in Flathead Coun-ty:
Roommates are fighting,
Gangs are a-forming,
Bigfork men are bick-rin'
Dogs are impounded,
Cats disappearing,
Trash is a-dumping,
Drunks are a-stumblin'

Dogs Bark All Day!!!

Neighbors raising hell
in Kalispell,
Driving woman buzzed -
And a miss-i-ing Kila canoooooe!'

Splendid!

My favorite entry on that day:

10:07 a.m. Two Bigfork men bickered over mechanical things and concealed weapons.

Which leads to the question... did they bicker over mechanical things and then conceal weapons, or was their bickering about mechanical things and also about concealed weapons ?

And : Which cable channel will have Mechanical Things and Concealed Weapons next season ?

I like this one:
"2:16 p.m. Dogs on Looking East Drive in Somers reportedly bark every minute of every day"

That's just once, in unison, every minute, every day. The dogs sit around staring at their watches timing the barks.
First one to miss buys the beer.

"Here comes Honey Boo Boo with a concealed weapon!"

*raises lighter and waves it in ligirl's general direction*

you know how sneaky those canoes can be.

So the canoe went rogue, not missing?

THIS is even more disturbing?

4:15 p.m. Someone saw a small pack of very young children traveling on foot down Highway 2 East.


Where is the Seal Team when you need them?

Omniskeptic: a most perplexing oardeal

Someday I hope to go to Flathead County and make the police blotter.
"Several residents reported that a woman driving a classic 1999 white Mercury, with N.C. license plates, was found standing in middle of the road screaming for residents to do something crazy so it will be on Dave Barry's blog."

4:16 PM Further information indicated that the children were being pursued by a seal team. Barking in the background was determined to be dogs, as usual, not seals.

Jump ahead an issue to learn, "An inmate in the county jail was up to no good.

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