FRANCE ON HIGH ALERT

London Attacked by Giant Rubber Duck

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Comments

[oneblankspace]

'And why were you late this morning?'

'The bridge was up to let a rubber duck pass through.'

'We won't be needing your services anymore.'

[Just Some Guy]

The scary thing is: that thing is just a duckling. They're yellow when young, but grow other colors when they mature. So in a few months, it might just return to devour Buckingham Palace.

Also, it probably thinks that tugboat is its mother. The boat pilot had better find other work, quickly.

[Omniskeptic]

"Online bingo company?"

Call my broker!

[queensbee]

rubber duckie, youre the one, rubber duckie.......

[nursecindy]

I love this but I have a feeling if this had happened in Miami it would have lasted about 30 seconds.

[Ralph]

Whya no chicken?

[Jeff Meyerson]

Just Some Guy: you've just written the next SyFy Channel Saturday night movie!

[Just Some Guy]

Jeff Meyerson, that's brilliant. Will you co-produce?

It came in peace. Just one piece. It was a sunny day, and it made people happy. (sounds of laughter and applause) And it left in peace. But then...

...it came back. (sounds of deep-bass quacking; footage of huge mallard drake trampling Big Ben and London Bridge, which, strangely, is in Lake Havasu City, AZ...maybe this shows frightening migratory powers...needs work, maybe)

And one man, a humble tugboat pilot, is London's only hope. (footage of homeless, unshaven Londoner staring in horror) Not much hope. Just a small piece.

[Omniskeptic]

Too bad Dennis Hopper's dead. He'd be great to play the duck.

[Steve]

At the end of the movie, the duck is flying off after destroying much of London.
A missile is fired, in a last, desperate effort to save the rest of the world.
There's a large explosion.
As the credits roll, a lone feather floats down. A lone, gigantic feather.
Which crushes Forrest Gump.

[Just Some Guy]

Get me YouTube!

[Steve (The 24 Guy)]

Trojan duck!

The invaders will be easy to spot. They'll be be dizzy and will be speaking in really high squeaky voices.

[poker]

Is this one of those fundraising deals where they float thousands of duckies and a winner is chosen at the end?

[Just Some Guy]

By the way, Jeff, Steve, Omniskeptic, and pretty much everyone who reads this blog (and especially Dave and Judi), I can't recommend Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus strongly enough. I'm pretty sure there's an exploding whale in there somewhere.

[padraig]

I want Giant Rubber Ducky vs. Sta-Puft Man! Explosive action!

[wiredog]

Didn't Dr Who do this episode?

[Dmentd]

wiredog, I'm guessing it was more likely Dr. Whyfo.

[PirateBoy]

This is Duck One. That's why England is better than France. The French forgot Two Duck....

[Omniskeptic]

Thanks, PirateBoy. That was today's chuckle.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Just One Guy: missed that one (fortunately, judging by the review) but did see the other Deborah Gibson epic (set in Florida, of course): Mega Python vs. Gateroid, which featured the memorable (yet somehow, ignored by the Academy, catfight with Tiffany).

[wizkid65]

All we need is about 150 Gallons of Duck Sauce and a really big Wok!

[Just Some Guy]

Oh, wow, Jeff Meyerson. I've seen shark and octopus and shark and crocosaurus, but I haven't finished the trilogy. Thank you, thank you for helping me 'n' the boys out here.

BTW, Crocosaurus has Tiffany as well. The special effects are...special.

[Baron of Gray Matter]

You should see the size of my LOOFAH!

[Dmentd]

Quack quack, m*****f*****.

[Spiny Norman]

FRANCE ON HIGH ALERT

Too late, they already surrendered last spring.

[EyeGore]

I am on an American flight and I swear a giant duck just flew by.

[Spiny Norman]

Must be Global Warming.

[Omniskeptic]

Ministry of Defense. What's your emergency?

You will not believe what my dog just brought home!