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November 08, 2012


"The BBC actually said, 'But you can't do that because we need to go through the regulations and health and safety and everything in case we discover a signal from an alien civilisation'."

(Thanks to Bill Moore)


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Reception might be an issue as well due to Fawlty Towers.

Health and safety was probably not the biggest issue; what if the aliens are using foul language?


What about a wardrobe malfunction?

If some earthling named me Threapleton Holmes B, aliens would be the least of their problems.

The question, "What planet are you from?", now has a whole new meaning.

The safety monitors at the BBC, clearly, are not from this planet.

The question, "What planet are you from?", now has a whole new meaning.

We are from the planet PROPER ENGLISH! It is a death penalty offense to end a sentence with a preposition.

You will now die!

Resistance is futile!

We health inspectors were being trained on enforcing a new regulation.
I asked the trainer who wrote the, in my opinion, stupid regulation?
"The Cabinet", he replied.
"The Cabinet", I returned, "is a building. It didn't write squat. What person wrote this?"
"Why do you want to know?"
"Because," I said, "it's easier to cuss someone when you know his name."
And to think, they paid me extra to retire.
Who wrote those regulations?

Following an investigation into the matter, the BBC's Director of Otherwordly Affairs, Simpleton J. Tinfoilderby III, publicly apologized to all Threapleton Holmes B-ians for any offense caused by this unfortunate misunderstanding, offered his immediate resignation, and teleported off the air.

Back, you proper English planet beings! Do you know what I have here?

Aieee! Back to the mothership! He's packing a copy of Garner's!

And it's -- gasp -- Third Edition!

Which program is better and designing and creating an online magazine? Joomla or WordPress?

'Elfinsafety, still lookin' for Earth....

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