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September 23, 2012

WE'RE SURE THERE'S A PERFECTLY INNOCENT EXPLANATION

A man sought emergency treatment at hospital in Auckland this week with an eel stuck up his bottom.

(Thanks to Ralph)

And, yes, it was a consenting eel.

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THAT'S a Moray!


nttawwt

Har.

They said the guy was OK. (Really? How OK could a guy who got an eel in his keel be anyway?) Back to my point, what was the fate of the eel? Maybe Ogden Nash's poem should have a line added:

I don't mind eels
except as meals
and the way they feels
during the hospital ordeals

With apologies.

hmmmm....could've been worse:

♫ You can't see it
It's electric!
You gotta feel it
It's electric!
Ooh, it's shakin'
It's electric...!

"According to the Department of Conservation website, there are two main types of eel found in New Zealand - the shortfin and the longfin." -- For his sake, I hope it was a shortfin.

"Eels migrate up streams as elvers to find suitable adult habitat. [SNICKER] ... Eels are secretive, nocturnal and prefer habitats with plenty of cover. [SNICKER] They hunt by smell rather than sight. [BWAHAHAHAHA!]"

I have often thought that "incident" is one of those inherently funny words, like "monkey" or "Nugent." Somehow, though, I don't see eel-up-bum-incident making it into the lexicon.

An eelaborate procedure required, and.yes eels have always been bottom feeders.

Note to self: Never EVER make a bar bet with a Kiwi.


@Snork Mark.

Another reason we never go into the water here in Nu Zillan.

There is always an eel or a Hobbit trying to get up your butt.

It was a one in a million shot, Doc...

Ewwwwwwww, gross.

Google "butt eel" if you have the stomach for it. Dude's lucky he lived.

Don't ask why I know that.

I had no idea they were bottom feeders.

Omni, so the Monkey Nugent Incident... ?

Eel be sorry!

Another innuendo?

I guess the gerbil just wasn't enough for him anymore

I 'ope 'eel be OK in the mornin'.

There's an eel in my keel
Cause I'm cryin' from you dear
You are always up my hind..

Eel be seeing you
In all those old familiar places...

Rectum? It darn near killed 'em!

The dark side of the Butthole Surfers?

"C'mon, baby, let's put the past behind us. This time it's for eel."

"The eel was about the size of a decent sprig of asparagus..."

A decent asparagus wouldn't do that to a man.

Jeff - yeah, the monkey-Nugent thing. It is alleged to have taken place in Philadelphia, and there were these black helicopters, and ... oh, it's too horrible. I can't go on.

Huge *snork* @ justsomeguy

The logical part of my mind immediately started figuring out how one would get an eel up one's netherlands.
Then, the more logical part started asking, "Why would you want to know?"
They are now arguing.

I don't see why everyone is so surprised; from the eel's point of view, it was definitely an emergency.

Sushi anyone?

LZ? No. Not. Ever. Again.

Uh-oh; my hovercraft is full of eels.

I had several male patients come to the ER with a similar problem. Only it usually involved Mag Lite Flashlights and not eels.

What's that called, cindy, lightning bug syndrome?

Don't worry, the medical industry is following this story closely.

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