Dave Barry's Blog

WE'RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER HAMBURGER

The World's Largest Onion.

(Thanks to Jan in Grimsby)

 

GOOD FOR BUSINESS

Danish nursery workers are offering free childcare - so busy parents can find the time to make more babies.

(Thanks to Greg Snow, who says, "You know, the concept is a good one. I'm afraid Mrs. Snow and I would use the 2 hrs to take a nap.")

ATTENTION: MEN OF THE BLOG

Do not even bother complaining about this being posted, 'cause the women of the blog will shout you down.

(Thanks to Matt Filar and also thanks to The Blog who refused to post it but nevertheless forwarded it to the s.b. because he knows wha... well, let's just leave it at "thanks.")

CREEPING FASCISM UPDATE

Mom cited when toddler pees on sidewalk

(Thanks to The Perts)

THE HAPPIEST (burrrppp) PLACE ON EARTH

Magic Kingdom No Longer “Dry”, Ready To Serve Beer & Wine

(Thanks to Dan Barr)

FOR THOSE WHO WERE GETTING TIRED OF CATALOGS

Florida mailman accused of delivering cocaine on mail route

(Thanks to Jim S., who says: "Neither rain nor snow nor Snow...")

BULLETIN BULLETIN BULLETIN

Dolly Parton Gets Her Own Signature Slot Machines

(Thanks to jon harris, who says "I don't want to know what spins around.")

BE ON THE LOOKOUT

Indian carving recovered, beaver still missing, police say

(Thanks to Matt Filar and Chuck Cody)

IF THIS IS TRUE, ADOLESCENT MALES ARE THE SMARTEST HUMANS ON EARTH

Results of a study recently conducted at the University of Amsterdam show that those who are sexually aroused performed better in critical thinking tests than those who did not – that sex essentially makes you smarter.

(Thanks to Dan Barr)

WHO SAYS ROMANCE IS DEAD?

Police in Russia said a man accused of stealing 1.5 tons of hay allegedly took the haul from a neighbor's field as a makeup gift to his girlfriend.

(Thanks to The Perts)