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June 30, 2012

YOU FIRST

Why You Should Spiral-Cut Your Wiener

(Thanks to jon harris)

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It takes a big man to spiral-cut his own wiener.

Well I'd have to say a spiral cut wiener would be a great conversation piece, not so sure about looking cool.

I'm sure whut I say will offer sum clues as to my age (REALLY old!), but ... I'm reminded of an old parodic narrative poem ... one of the lines wuz: "He pulled his gun, and he shot her dead! The Dirty B!tch had a left-hand thread!"

(Of course, a preceding line offers a major clue as to his chagrin upon makin' this discovery: "Then over the hill came Dirty Dick. The only man alive, with a corkscrew pr!ck!") (Yeah ... I'm old ... or did I mention that already? HOWever, should any of y'all have a printable copy of that little adventure in rhyme and myth, I'd appreciate yer sendin' it to Moi Ownself ... I fergit the rest of the "poem" ...)

Nice nose, weiner boy.

Relish and ketchup on a hot dog? Yuck.

Where's the mustard?

Yawn. Carl Sagan and Steven Hawking spent a whole show talking about that.

why that headline was ... misleading. I AM SHOCKED!!

oh, and so was anthony!

That's kind of an interesting idea. The mustard, ketchup and pickle relish has a way of going in between the hotdog now.

For a minute I thought this was what happened to guys bored of piercing .

O the U: There are various versions; just Google "corkscrew cock" or "corkscrew prick" and you'll find Deadeye Dick, Screwy Dick, Joe McGlock, a man named Brock, etc.

RALPH! TYVM!!!

Y'know ... I've looked around fer that little gem of scatologicalness ... but never thot to g00gle the actual phraseologyness ...

Duh! (The "version" for which I'm lookin' wuz titled "Pi$$-pot Pete" ... )

Well ... that din't werk much ... lotsa "short" stuff, but I'm lookin' fer a longer narrative-type item ... but now I have a method (of sorts) to aid my search ... an exercise in futility, with no rational reason to pursue it ... heckuva deal, eh?

We understand Bill Clinton always used a spiral cut wiener in the White House.

Ketchup on a hot dog is unAmerican. Or just plain gross.
Bet it wasn't even refrigerated.
Ouch, get off me, woman!

That's what cost him his seat in Congress

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