Dave Barry's Blog

IF HOLLYWOOD DOESN'T MAKE A MOVIE ABOUT FLATHEAD COUNTY, THEN HOLLYWOOD IS AN IDIOT

9:33 a.m. An employee at a Kalispell gas station discovered a butcher knife lodged inside the tank of a toilet.

(Thanks to Flathead County Correspondent Jeff Meyerson)

BRAZILIAN POLITICAL UPDATE

The red and white panties, described by O Globo daily as "rather large" and "not a G-string," were inadvertently dropped by one of five deputies who arrived late for a vote on cyber crimes on May 15.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

POST HUNT UPDATE

It's a big pile of fun.

UPDATE

UPDATE

POST HUNT UPDATE

Big crowd.

POST HUNT UPDATE

THE WASHINGTON POST HUNT

It starts today at noon. See you there. I'll be the guy pretending to know what the hell is happening.

EDINBURGH MARATHON RESULTS

This just in.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

IT WAS RELEASED AFTER PRODUCING A VALID FLORIDA DRIVER'S LICENSE

Enormous bladder stone weighing more than 1kg removed from man in China

(Thanks to John Gregg)

SOMEBODY SHOULD TELL HUGH

Crystal Harris & Hugh Hefner Are Back Together'

(Thanks to jon harris)

MEANWHILE IN POLE-VAULTING

Athletics-Hooker feeling good after getting airborne in Rome

(Thanks to ligurl)

JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT THE SITUATION IN FLATHEAD COUNTY COULD NOT DETERIORATE ANY FURTHER

6:08 p.m. Someone accidentally “pocket-dialed” 911 while grocery shopping, forcing a dispatcher to listen to a conversation about specific enchilada toppings.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

A FLORIDA ETC.

Excruciating video of a hapless woman spending SIX MINUTES trying to scrape into a parking spot... (and then driving off in a huff)

(Thanks to Jan in Grimsby)

In the woman's defense: It's hard to park a huff.

DUTCH ROYALTY UPDATE

The crown prince's younger brother Prince Constantijn also hurled a toilet in the contest, but not as far.

(Thanks to Jan in Grimsby)

ALL IS RIGHT WITH THE WORLD AGAIN

Madonna brings back the cone bra 22 years after its inception

(Thanks to The Perts)

CSI: GROVE CITY

Missing 650-Pound Black Angus Bull Calf Last Seen At Burger King

(Thanks to Ralph)

AT LAST...

...a practical use for cats.

(Thanks to Ralph)