Dave Barry's Blog

DOO-DAH, DOO-DAH

Stressed-out penguins on the mend

(Thanks to Ralph)

We saw them open for the Strawberry Alarm Clock.

THE FORCE CAUGHT UP WITH HIM

Obiwan Kenobi Arrested In Roseville Hit-And-Run

(Thanks to Renee the First)

WELL OK, THEN

A Chicago-area man who allegedly was clocked driving 111 mph through a 45 mph forest preserve told a patrol officer he was in a hurry to “try to go have sex with a girl he liked.”

(Thanks to Bob Brogan)

DENTAL HYGIENE TIP OF THE WEEK SO FAR

The lawsuit said Galbreath instructed David to have X-rays taken at a chiropractor's office, rather than at an emergency room. David had the X-rays taken at a nearby chiropractic center and brought them back for Galbreath to read, it said. Galbreath spotted the screwdriver "on the stomach" and instructed David to eat a diet high in fiber and to look for the screwdriver after bowel movements.

(Thanks to Jenny Kellner and Sharon [The Minx] Lurie)

DAMN

Yesterday was National Hairball Awareness Day.

(Thanks to jon harris)

HAR

Citizens Apposed to the Library Project

(Thanks to ScottMGS)

IT ALSO MAY HAVE THE OPPOSITE EFFECT

Toilet hanging 15 stories in the air may make you hold it in

(Thanks to nursecindy)

ALWAYS CARRY A SPARE

Portable meth lab explodes in Oklahoma man's pants

(Thanks to Susan in Port Orchard, jon harris, Trent Whitney and funny man)