« Previous | Main | Next »

March 30, 2012

IT IS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THE NATIONAL GUARD IS DISPATCHED TO FLATHEAD COUNTY

3 p.m. A man with slicked back hair reportedly stole a Guns N' Roses-themed bicycle from an East Idaho Street location.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Comments

Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

I'm starting to get the feeling that these are all just ideas for some new Coen brothers or David Lynch films.

10:04 a.m. A woman in Lakeside reported that her boyfriend kicked her knee and threw things at her. He was last seen wandering down the street in his green turtleneck and sporting what could only be described as “the beginnings of a mustache.”

Sounds like a keeper, lady.

This is where Lenny Briscoe goes for vacation.

Was that kid "hogtied" before they stole his bicycle?

The band-themed bike must have been easy to spot, as it was missing an Axl.

How exactly does one "inevitably coax" another?

8:32 p.m. A Kalispell woman requested assistance in keeping her determined 7-year-old from running in the road.

10:30 p.m. Reportedly, a teenage boy was “hogtied” and thrown into a green car on East Idaho Street.

See, it may take a while, but people are more than willing to help one another in Flathead. We should learn from these civic minded folks!

*Snork @PB*

Sounds like you need a lot of "Patience" in Flathead County.

The person who transcribes these is a bit of a mystic, maybe even a poet. "Inevitably coax" is just one example of many phrases supporting my theory that a new literature is emerging in Flathead County, and it's going to turn western culture on its head. Or somebody is just really bored. One or the other.

Okay, Dave. I live in Flathead County and am half thrilled and half horrified when you post these tidbits from our police blotter.

I live one block away from a place called "Del's Bar" (pretty much like it sounds, plus has a drunken mini-golf course) and just noticed on their sign out front that they're having a superhero costume party in April.

I'm guessing that the calls to the police dept. will be a lot of fun that night. You have an open invitation to stay at my house if you'd like to attend.

You'd have your choice of an airbed or a waterbed, if that helps. I could probably knit you your own superhero costume to wear. AND I'm a very funny atheist.

Notice the hour of Jodie's postings. That bar must be a boisterous place.

What say we encourage Dave to accept the offer? Sounds like there'd be a great article in it.

Ha ha! That's funny. I'm on Mountain time, I think I actually posted that around midnight. But I'm pretty sure there's another Pulitzer in it for Dave if he makes the trip.

The comments to this entry are closed.

-
 
Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | Copyright | About The Miami Herald | Advertise