Dave Barry's Blog

UM, THANKS

Pope sends people of Cuba one of their missing crocodiles as a gift

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

FLORIDA LICENSES ARE ON THE WAY BY BOAT

Tourists try to 'drive' to island

(Thanks to W. von Papineau and ligirl)

NEW YORK: A CITY GRIPPED BY FEAR

Thieves in cowboy hats steal bunny from swanky SoHo boutique

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

(Note that three people got bylines on this story.)

ST. PATRICK'S DAY IS TOMORROW

Time to round up your mates.

(Thanks to Jeff Renner)

Related: How to make green beer.

(Thanks to funny man)

Also Related: But for bartender Hayley Blakeney, St. Patrick's Day is her worst "nightmare" -- the 28-year-old is petrified of Guinness.

(Thanks to The Perts)

NO THANKS

Meet the woman who drinks and bathes in her urine

(Thanks to Craig Roberts and R.D. Drysdale)

THERE'S SOME HARD PARTYING DURING SPRING BREAK

Spring breaker finds lungs on beach

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

THOSE TERRORIST BASTARDS

Sneeze causes accident that knocks out power in Winona

(Thanks to Fred Hudson)

'HE WAS THE STAR OF FRENCH LIVESTOCK REARING'

Jocko the bull is gone.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

FINE DINING UPDATE

Hell Pizza in New Zealand plays ‘Pizza Roulette’; Puts liquid pepper on one slice

(Thanks to funny man)

CSI: IOWA

Waterloo teen accused of setting beef jerky on fire

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

MAKES SENSE, WHAT WITH THE GAS PRICES HERE

Mysterious object seen refuelling from Sun

(Thanks to Monique)

FORGET MARCH MADNESS

A guinea pig called Truffles has successfully broken the world long jump record for his species.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

BRILLIANT

The courses, which cost about £2,000, give office workers the chance to round up a flock of unruly sheep and guide them into a pen.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

THE CONTINUING ASSAULT ON OUR FUNDAMENTAL RIGHTS CONTINUES TO CONTINUE

LAFAYETTE, Colorado (AP) -- U.S. police have ticketed a man who is accused of tying his cat to a rock after the feline refused to go jogging.

(Thanks to Joe in Japan)

LOUISIANA TACKLES THE ISSUES

Bill proposes no straw hole for drive-through daiquiris

(Thanks to Ralph)