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April 22, 2011


A 42-year-old Chandler man was arrested Monday on charges of indecent exposure after police said he was seen masturbating in front of a woman wearing a Statue of Liberty costume.

(Thanks to Chuck Cody, who speculates that "he was yearning to breathe free.")


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Police said the woman also reported that the same man had masturbated in front of her three times in the last three weeks but she had not reported the previous incidents.

Or...maybe it was personal?

At least he wasn't doing it in front of a prison. He'll have a hard enough (har!) time inside as it is.

Ahhh, the old Statue of Liberty playing with himself.

Sounds to me like a man that really loves his country.

He was holding a grudge against Lady Liberty.
Wait a minute, that's not his grudge.

See, when I did that I did it in front of the real Statue of Liberty, the one on the stamp.

"Hey, babe, wanna hold MY torch?..."

This is nothing. You should see me in front of Michelangelo's Statue of David.

The Chandler Handler

He wanted to huddle her masses.

Doing your taxes is more of a bend-over-and-spread-'em sort of thing.

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