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January 24, 2011

'TIL DEATH DO YOU PART

People are getting married in funeral homes.

(Thanks to Mark Schlesinger)

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According to the NY Times, Miami Beach offers a classier alternative.

We hang out at a funeral home for the 4th of July parade in Wheaton, IL. The space is nice.

i don't know... kinda strange to get married where so many people get laid


to rest

And do they fill out their tax forms as part of the ceremony? Just to keep the whole inevitability theme going, y'know?

p.s. If the funeral home you're hiring for your wedding offers you free use of their courtesy vehicle, do NOT take it.

(Unless of course the couple wants to ride from the church to the reception in a horizontal position, which I'll assume most grooms are ok with.)

SANDY!!!!!!!!!!!

(snork, that was funny)

SANDY~!!! I'm shocked!

Lots of stiffs too. Just sayin'. Seems inappropriate.

They've been doing that in my area for years. Usually for people who do not belong to a specific Church or who are getting married for the second time. In fact one of the chapels at a local funeral home is quite beautiful and very old. However, there are not any cemeteries around any of them.

The perfect place to bury your libido.

When I was young, I didn't like going to weddings. My grandmother would tell me, "You're next."

However, she stopped doing that after I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.

No matter what, life is over.

*Smacks* Loudmouth.

Guess what they have in churches besides weddings?
I don't see much difference.
My wife and I were married in a church, I forget what denomination, that was not her church. Her church and minister would not perform a mixed marriage ceremony. She had to import a more liberal preacher.
Come to think of it, I was so stressed out I don't remember much of the actual event.
A funeral home would have worked as well for me but I don't think she would have gone along.

But sometimes they push the package deal, based on
the movie:

A wedding and a funeral combo pack!!!


Creeps me out. The wedding part, that is...

The ghost of the departed sometimes smell worse that some who just f***ed.

So, does any offer a casket to "seal" the deal?

But the vows are changed to:

Do you ---(insert name)-- take--(insert spouse's name)-- for better or worse, richer or poorer, until you bury (him or her) following your funeral here?

longest sentence uttered by a man: 'I do'

@Sandy -- the sentence gets a lot longer if you respond with "You talkin' to me?"

asses to ashes...

Wonder if they offer a package deal. You know, for when your life is over, and for when your life is over.

*SMACKS* above blog guys for putting down marriage. Y'all know your wives are the best thing that ever happened to you and if it weren't for them you would be sitting in front of the tv in your dirty underwear with nothing but empty beer bottles and pizza boxes around you. Who wants to live like that? Remember you would have to get your own beer and pizza.

Did that last line go "until death are you parted", or "until death are you pardoned"?

Years ago my dad said I could get married over his dead body. This place would've been perfect.

Just watch - to get rid of the 'ick' factor -funeral homes are gonna start renaming themselves - "Life Celebration Center"..."Memorial Springs"..."Better Wed or Dead Drive-thru"...

"Hello, Al's Chapel of Love and Interment. Better wed than dead, but let us plot your future."


The last thing my dad said to me before I got married was, "You know you don't have to do this". He was walking me down the aisle of the Church at the time. I should have listened to him.

nc, you *smackin'* us?

Some one has rightly said that "marriages are made in heaven".

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