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December 18, 2010

WE HAD BETTER HOPE THAT CATS DO NOT DEVELOP NUCLEAR WEAPONS

Because if they do, humanity is doomed.

PPETS-7878260dt
(Thanks to jon harris)

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I love my cat, Maggie. I think she loves me. BUT if I tried to put something like this on her she would slice me to ribbons. This looks photoshopped to me. The cat is entirely too calm and there is no evidence of human blood anywhere.

Cats are there to remind us that not everything in nature has a function.

First picture: a mere cat wearing antlers....
Second picture: inSanity Claws

It looks photoshopped to me, too. Although apparently some cats are very calm.

I don't think my cats would have allowed it, either.

Cats do have a function - rodent control. Keep a couple of kitties in the house, and you aren't likely to have any mice.

And petting a kitty is good for blood pressure.

And petting a kitty is good for blood pressure.

Assuming you got permission first. Otherwise you are slapped with sexual assault.

I actually have that identical hat. I had a male orange tabby once who looked like Morris enjoyed modeling hats in fact he would sit there so nice and move his head side to side. So cute.

Pssst...my cat tells me they've already gone nuclear. They're just waiting for a lull in the action to use them.

Memo to all: Whatever you're doing, for God's sake don't stop!

I showed this image to one of my cats. She was completely indifferent about it. Go figure.

Our late Siamese, Jasmine, wasn't tame enough for that hat even under the total sedation the Vet insisted on before he would touch her. She would lie there totally limp, growling.
(The Vet's a good guy. Big, about 6'3", but he turned into a total wuss when we brought that little cat in. He learned his lesson on the first visit when she brought blood through the elbow-length leather gloves).

When you've been around cats long enough, you can recognize that " I'm going to knock over the Ming vase " look.

The photo does have some photo-shop-esque qualities..... One of my cats would run away and cry like a baby for weeks. The other would slice us to pieces, slice the hat to pieces, then bat the pieces all over the house.

And then knock over a Ming vase. He made short work of a nice mug I just got from an artist fundraiser.

OT: twenty eight years ago today, I married my sweet darling.
/OT

And the beagle came down this afternoon with a jingling ruffled collar. It was like, "rescue me, man". Women and Christmas, what is wrong with them?

Happy Anniversary, Tash! May you have many, many more. Loudmouth it's all the decorating shows on TV. If you guys would let us, we'd decorate you also.

That would look nice mounted over my fireplace.

Hey, calm down, I just meant the hat, the hat!!

Really I did.

Cindy,
Would you be putting stars on our trees?

wiredog, I could get into that act!

I had my feet "swept" out from under me once by a cougar who wanted to play. He wrestled me around and batted me back and forth for a little while. Then, when I had to leave, he looked crushed.
He had my whole right arm in his mouth at one point but didn't leave so much as a dent in my skin.
He was someone's "pet" but still, he was remarkably restrained.
His owner said that most people wouldn't come near him and he was probably overjoyed to find someone who would really play and fight back.
Beautiful cat.
(Neither of us was harmed in that production).

Krisl said "Keep a couple of kitties in the house, and you aren't likely to have any mice."

That's unless you own the world's most useless mouser, as we once did. We have a basement stair underneath another stair to the second floor. So one night the cat chased a mouse through the crack under the basement door. Then he ran around to the other stair to look for it.

Several times, though, I'd hear him growling and snarling and find him in fierce combat with a dead mouse caught in a trap. SO much easier that way.

My cat Walter (named for Walter Matthau because he's a grumpy old man) (not relation to the REAL Walter)
once caught a mouse outside, didn't know quite what to do with it, so brought it into the house & dropped it (alive) under the kitchen table. Happy Time!

I have forwarded this photo to the ASPCA.

I actually have a pic of one of my cats wearing a Santa hat and collar, sitting with my little girl. With bells, no less. It was our Christmas card last year. But this cat is about 14, declawed (I did not do it so please don't curse me) and she is madly in love with my daughter. Anyone else would have been bitten. Hard. Many, many times. btw, Mot: She is a great cat, and she serves a purpose. She loves us.

LSBB, my sister could dress our old Siamese tomcat in baby clothes. He was a sucker for her, went totally limp if she rubbed his tummy. But if I tried this with the little she-devil we have today--a half-feral stray, not a bad cat in her way--I would be photoshopping MY pictures for a while to cover up the scars.

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