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September 23, 2010

BUT LEGALLY THEY HAVE TO KNOCK FIRST

Police get search warrant for man’s rectum

(Thanks to John Regan)

UPDATE: Related item here.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Comments

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Complimentary long arm of the law reach around?

Well SOMEONE has to say it..."Rectum,. damned near killed 'im"

Police found a knife, marijuana, a digital scale and cash in his backpack, according to court documents.

Whew, for a second there I thought they found them in his rectum.

Who does he appeal to? Wait, don't answer that......

Good thing he didn't have that knife up there, or he might have been left with this -- ;

Stories like this make me so glad I have an office job working inside a little cubicle and do not have to do body cavity searches.

could it have been a ring around uranus, wot?

They'll find crack.

Remember: It is not the destination that counts, it is the journey.

Brown-capping nervous criminal.

"All right, Sir. Please unclench. We have a warrant."

"No. Ain't gonna do it."

"Ok, we'll do it the hard way. John, bring in the Jaws of Life."

*WAVES* @ Hammie!!

If the "Jaws of Life" don't work...bring Bubba.

I think that second guy is a Rectal Myopic -- he's got a short-sighed, sh*tty outlook on life.

*Waves @ Siouxie!!!*

Stop! Don't chute!

Anyone working on an article regarding worst songs for body cavity searches?

"You light up my life"

The update: Ewwww. bet they put them right back on the counter. If he thinks the sales girl is going to spank him he's sorely mistaken. Nigel is waiting for him in the tank.

Rearings.

Annie - "Long and winding road"

**snork** @ notsherly!!!


be interesting if either of these fellas end up with the good
Dr. Sachakov as a cellmate

Is that what the Playmates were doing in that picture now burned into my retinas? A multiple body cavity search? From the looks on their faces, they found jewelry.

Ha ha! Made you look!

Annie - "Feelings"

'tunnel of love'

-bruce springsteen

Annie, let's include "Ring of Fire."

I hope they at least put the earrings on the clearance rack. As for the guy who refused the cavity search the officer needs to remember that whatever goes up eventually comes down.

Very o/t butt... Mr. Stephen King was just on CNN talking about ebooks. And, may I say, looking very good! They asked him if he realized that most people think he is a scary person. He said he was civilized. Go Mr.King! back o/t

nursecindy - he can't be civilized - he's a Bosox fan.

So they have probe-able cause?

Cheeky devil.

Annie - Don't It Make My Brown Eye Blue

couldn't resist...!

(inspirational thanks to notsherly, annie & hammond rye)


♪ Rearings, nothing more than rearings,
trying to forget the rearings that i shoved...
Teardrops...(owww!) rolling down on my face,
trying to forget the rearings that i shoved.

Rearings, 'twas for my wife I 'reared 'em.
(I wish I never met you, girl...You'll never come again!!!).

Rearings, oww-ooww-ooowww rearings,
oowo-ow-ow, i feel you again in my arse.

Rearings: feeling like I've never lost 'em
(and feeling like I really have to fart)....

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! don't you be dissin' on my BFF, Stephen!!!

The cops were bound to get him in the end.

nursecindy so right!

A judge then signed a search warrant authorizing officers to search the man’s body cavity, and he was transported to Providence Sacred Heart Medical Center. The search came up empty.

“A jailer thought he saw something,” said Officer Brian Eckerlsey, spokesman for the Spokane Police Department. “But for whatever reason, it didn’t come out.”

A new meaning to Don't ask, don't tell?

Perhaps they should force above quantities of
laxative into him, and then observe his
movements closely, If there is/was anything there,
it find its way out.

No search warrant = fruit of the forbidden tree

Best song for doing a body cavity search whilst driving:
"Cracked Rear View" by Hootie & the Blowfish

Also - "Back that @ss up" and "My Humps"

♬What you gon' do with all that junk? All that junk inside your trunk? ♭

*snork! @ Siouxie and her rear view mood music*

Did police give him anything to go on?

♫ Shake, Shake, Shake (Shake Your Booty) ♫

Annie- "Workin'in a coal mine".

♫ Lookin' fer Love in All the Wrong Places ♪

♪ Ooh, That Smell ♫:

love stinks

something by Spinal Tap...."Break Like the Wind," maybe

"A Horse With No Name" is hands down my most unfavorite song.

Also, I've often thought that if I were a man and was going to prison, I would have a tramp stamp tattoo that said, "No Entry In Rear". You can't be too careful.

nc - that's just daring them. Siouxie told me.

cincy, better tats would be "Enter at your own risk" or "Caution: Slippery when wet". Annie showed me.

me too cindy, i absotively hate that song, and am glad dave included it in book of bad songs.

Speak O Toothless One.

Got to admire a man who stands on principle and won't bend. Or cough.

Did they leave him alone in a cell, with a toilet, while they got the warrant?

With a cocoa butter suppository?

Police get search warrant for man’s rectum
Nice trade.

mud, darling, it's a shame you gave up your butt-snake poetry because if ever a story was made for it....

BUT LEGALLY THEY HAVE TO KNOCK FIRST

Knock 3 times on my buttocks if you want me.
Twice on my pipe
If the answer is nooooooooo!
Oh big Bubba!

with apologies to Tony Orlando and Dawn. (not the dishwashing liquid)

Puckerin' buttstash!

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