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August 27, 2010

YOU ARE NOW FREE TO CHANGE YOUR UNDERWEAR

British Airways apologized to passengers after an emergency message warning they were about to crash into the sea was played by mistake.

(Thanks to RussellMc, Bill Hudgins and Corey Smith)

Comments

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Psyche!

I mean, why even have a message like that? Wouldn't the whole careening-downward-at-700-mph thing get the idea across?

"Another passenger was reported saying: 'I can't think of anything worse than being told your plane's about to crash."

How about English food?

Fortunatly, the passengers were able to immediately generate enough 'urine-power' to refuel the plane.

"Just kidding!

"Uh, April Fool?

"Sheesh, you people have no sense of humo[u]r."

*deploys slide, grabs beer and leaves*

Oopsie!

Follow-up message: " Pillows, blanket, clean underwear... Now available from your flight attendant... $ 10. "

"Assume crash positions..."

Let me get this straight, the planes are so automated that the pilot pushes a button to initiate the message rather than getting on the PA system and doing it live? If I am being told of my impending death, I don't want it lipsynched. Too many damn buttons, I'd say.

New hidden camera show from Fox - So You Think You Can Die!

Looks like they picked the wrong week to give up heroin.

Masn can I ever relate to the passengers.

A few years ago I was flying from Ottawa to Miami on our corporate jet, a Cessna Citation. Not a big aircraft, accomodates 8 passengers.

Somewhere around Washington one engine flamed out. No problem, I thought, the plane was fully capable of flying on one engine.

Then I heard the pilot say something to the co-pilot that sounded like "ahh Sh*t, we're toast", and we began to descend rapidly.

I have never been a nervous flyer, but at that point I literally felt my sphincter tighten to the point where it was almost climbing inside my body.

Well I am still here so everything went well....but thrill rides like that are not for me

As Bill Cosby said, "First you say it...then you DO it!"

Obviously, the plane was just running out of fuel and they were trying to harness the Power of the PEE-ple.

I wonder how many of those passengers will ever get on a plane again.

Couldn't the announcement have been more specific? I'd want to know what body of water we were heading for. Do I need to dig out my Barry Manilow picture to scare away sharks, or protect myself from flying carp?

Ralph, you carry a picture of Barry Manilow around with you?

What happened to those stiff upper lips, blokes?

WVplantman: The PAs the pilots make are never automated. A lot, maybe even most, of the safety-demo PAs and the like that the flight attendants make *are* automated. I'm certain this was the latter.

I'm equally certain this was triggered by some random electrical anomaly. It's fairly common for the switch from ship's power to ground power (or vice-versa) to trigger our "welcome aboard" PA in either French or Spanish, and I'd be willing to bet if the British AAIB looks at the flight data recorder, they'll find a similar electrical anomaly right before this started playing.

Chris the Airline Pilot

OT/ For bloggers and bloggerettas who enjoy the NY Times Sunday crossword puzzle (and I'm guessing there's more than a few of you), you should also check out Rex Parker, who provides an amusing critique of same.

/OT

They were trying to get rid of all that anti-diarrheal medicine that someone ordered by mistake.
Sold out in one minute flat.

Didn't we see this happen on "LOST".

The announcement was in French or something. The English speakers were just told the plane was on course or something normal like that.

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