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July 23, 2010


Clyde Armstrong said he was not happy about the way his power company trimmed the trees on his property, so he decided to tackle the job himself.

What could possibly go wrong?

(Thanks to Jersey Jeff)


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I had a neighbor who pretty much did the same thing, except rather than getting zapped, he wiped out the power, cable, and phone lines to most of the neighborhood.

Now when he wants a tree trimmed he just calls the power company and says, "Hello, this is Bob, and I'm about to trim some trees." Their response is, "Hold on, we'll be right out and take care of it for you!"

I think they got that last line, He was expected to recover completely within six weeks, wrong. It should actually read "He is expected to be completely dead within 6 weeks."

My idiot former brother in law decided the one-armed chainsaw technique worked for him. He almost ended up one-armed for good.

*snork* at pogo's neighbor

After all that, he wants to do it again?? I think his brains got fried, too.

If his wife is smart she'll call someone to cut the tree down before he is up and around again. Only a man would almost break every bone in his body and then sit there and try to figure out how to do it better while getting better.

"Hey honey, hold my beer while I do this."

"Despite the ordeal, Armstrong said he still plans to cut up that tree, albeit with a different strategy."
Atta boy, you show that natural selection who's boss.

"cracked ribs and hips, a punctured lung and a dislocated shoulder"

Yeah, that's about par for me for any home improvement project involving a ladder.

This guy may have been more skilled than the story indicates; you can't always predict which way a branch or tree will fall. I knew a professional linemen and tree guy who got zapped when a branch brushed my service line; his comment was "Ouch! It bit me!" A few years later he was clearing a power line and was knocked off a pole despite a safety belt, and broke various parts of his mainframe. His assistant, who had been pulling a rope attached to a limb, came running over, only to be told "Help me up." The answer: "You're not getting up from this one." He was back at work a few months later. Some people are tough, not stupid.


*snork* @ slightly askew.

i'm with ralph. this guy didn't look like a darwin to me either.

Armstrong's tree trimming led to a jolting,
for which his wife gave him a scolding.
Twas a small step for man,
but it was his next plan,
that his wife found was really re-volting.

Good one bonmot.

Taking matters into his own hands, I'm sure made him feel empowered.

*snork* @ bonmot....I'd advise the wife to pony up some more life insurance on this doofus. Punkin's right - he won't be healed in 6 weeks, because you can't fix stupid.

I really need to take down a tree with a limb over (read "on") a power line on my wife's farm. I know where the electric breaker is, so that's not a problem. It is that big beady-eyed dove sitting on a nest that stops me. She looks down at me and I swear its a mind-meld thing or something. "You shall not pass!"

I say let him do it and have the whole family out under the tree watching.

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