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April 30, 2010

WE THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME

Smart underpants.

(Thanks to RussellMc)

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It's bad enough that they are making fridges that can communicate with us now our undies? It does give new meaning to the phrase, smartie pants though. Another reason to go commando.

"Warning! Warning! Warning! My owner has eaten a burrito! Danger! Danger! Explosive decompression in Five, Four, Three, Two, One!"

So now when I emit methane (a global warming gas) my undies are gonna tell on me and I'll get hit with extra carbon taxes?

The chili industrial complex will NOT be pleased.

♫ "If you're happy and you know it
Then your underpants will show it..."

Code red: vital signs outside normal range
Code green: vital signs within normal range
Code blue: mood indicators trending downward
Code orange: mood indicators trending upward
Code yellow: time for new underwear

mtb, code brown: Owner should be shot from at least 100 meters away.

Dude, she's googling your groin at this very moment.

So when your Viagra kicks in, an embedded chip begins playing Johnny Mathis' singing " Chances Are " ?

I refuse to let Microsoft into my underpants! Can you imagine what the Blue Screen of Death would feel like???

What, no boxers?

♫I writhe in thongs that make the whole world think.♫

What's the big deal? Women are always telling us we do all our thinking down there already, amirite?

OMFG! Now there's an app for THAT?!

He thought he could hide his erection,
with his hips in a different direction.
But she googled his lap,
applied "Find Wood" app,
and his boner could not dodge detection.

Maybe they can make a sheet set out of that to let you know that you need your marriage blanket?

Combined with these for every frat party!

they have snazzy-graphs so you know this is real science.

"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been 7 days since my last confession. Here are my sins. Downloading from my pants now."

Dave's caption says "We thought this day would never come".

So Dave, does that mean that you had previously envisioned such undergarments? You really are some kind of savant genius.

My "mood indicators" trend downward in hot weather. In cool weather, they trend sharply upwards. When my mother-in-law visits, they disappear.

"Shrinkage has occurred."

Where are my posts going?
*snork* @ bonmot.

She gazed on his junk and then wrote him
words too salacious to quote 'em.
With his drawers wired up,
including his cup,
he received it right in the scrotum.

Thank god I wasn't drinking beer people-- it would be all over the keyboard, cats, floor...

Integrating biosensors into clothing isn’t as easy as it sounds. Attention has to be paid, for instance, to the impact fabric morphology and continuous deformation (through body movement) have on sensor performance.

“Compared to wearable entertainment systems,” according to a paper published in the March 2010 issue of the journal Analyst, “on-body healthcare monitoring devices must be highly robust and durable in connection with the wearer’s daily activity.”

Won't be putting something like thatin the thong, specially before pole-dancing.

You guys seem really pumped , um, happy, um, ready .... enjoying Friday!!

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