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April 06, 2010


Police have arrested two women after they tried to take the body of a dead relative onto a plane at Liverpool John Lennon Airport.

(Thanks to Chuck Cody and trustf8)


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He's not dead, he's pining for the fjords

This is a publicity stunt for WEEKEND AT BERNIES: The Next Day, right?

He's not dead, he's stunned.

Maybe he's considered "carrion" luggage.

I'd rather have him in the row with me than the toddler doing the air raid siren imitation for 4 hours, or the guy who though bathing was optional.

I wish Dad lived close enough to me that I could drive there on vacation.

Bad luck! Dead people are just drawn to cemeteries. The plane would have crashed in one. There would have been thousands dead!

Staff became suspicious when the women tried to check in the man in a wheelchair...

...as they offered assistance with their luggage, & asked where they'd like their carry ons, one woman replied "Over my dead body".

Were the two women McCartney's daughters?

BTW, double dang you Annie. It was TOTALLY my turn to recycle that joke.

*sets alarm 20 minutes earlier for tomorrow*

Had he boarded, the flight could have gone off corpse.

*snork* @ Annie. It's the first time I've heard it.

NotSherly - you haven't lived until you've heard that joke beat to death.

What were they supposed to do? They certainly couldn't bring him on board cremated. All the flights nowadays are non-smoking.

The whole joke, for NotSherly's dubious benefit:

A vulture is boarding a passenger flight when the stewardess notices the vulture has a dead rabbit tucked under each wing. The stewardess asks, "What makes you think you can bring those onto this flight?"

The vulture replies, "It's ok, it's my carrion."

I thought you were only allowed one piece of carrion these days.

Thanks pad.

My daughter's U-8 or U-7 (somewhere in there) soccer team were issued Pepto-Bismol pink jerseys and told to pick a team name. They decided on the "Vultures".

So I spent a season rooting for the Pink Vultures, which WBAGNFARB.

I scanned the headline as, trying to take the dead John Lennon's body on an airplane. I need new glasses.

"Off corpse"..."carrion" those were GREAT puns !

a lot of people love their willi...

It was a grave situation when after a couple of stiff drinks he started coffin.

"I [did not] kill my Willi. My Willi is my god. I [have loved] my Willi for 22 years."

I know where she's comin' from. I'm 31, and for about the last 22 years I've been lovin' my willi.

"Anke! Looks like the Viagra is finally starting to work. Willi's willy is starting to get stiff."

They can always use the universal German defense, "I know nothing. NOTHING."

They'll get off with a stiff fine.

Yesterday, my troubles seemed so far away
Now it look as though they're here to stay
Oh, Willi passed on just Yesterday

Suddenly, he's not half as warm as he used to be
There's an odor hanging next to me
oh, yesterday came suddenly

Why he had to go I don't know, he couldn't say
I said something wrong, now I long for yesterday

Yesterday, Willi was booked into Seat 1A
Now I need a place to hide him away
oh, I should have checked him yesterday

Why he had to go I don't know, he will not say
I said something wrong, now the Bobbies want to take him away.

Yesterday, Rigor was just a word to say
Now I can't fold his legs away
oh, I believe in yesterday...

Y'all heard about the first man to die from a Viagra overdose?

Open casket.

Was he in the upright, locked position?

*zaps in*

*SNORK & WAVE* @ Hammie!!!

*zaps out*

Passenger: Why is this flight being delayed?
Counter agent: A passenger is late.
Passenger: I thought if passengers arrived late, they just missed the flight.
Counter agent: No, you see the passenger is late. It's a late passenger.
Passenger: Right. He just misses the flight, then.
Counter agent: No, he arrived on time.
Passenger: I thought you said he was late.
Counter agent: I did. He IS late, sir.
Passenger: He arrived on time, but he's late?
Counter agent: Correct.
Passenger: So, he arrived on time, but is now missing?
Counter agent: No, we know exactly where he is.
Passenger: So, why isn't he on the flight.
Counter agent: He's late.....

*Waves @ Siouxie!!!*

*snork* @ mtb!

Good one Meanie!

I read the news today, oh boy
A pair from Oldham, Greater Manchester
They rolled a third one in a chair
There was no heartbeat there
Now they they know how many pounds it costs to buy a first class fare
I'd love to wheel you on...

*snork* at meanie

When your willi is ill
Wheel him there
In a chair thru the doorway

If you book it ahead
They can't prove that he's dead
On the runway...

*SNORK* @ Meanie

"Flight attendant, can I have his Kosher meal?"

Meanie ...

"What's his name?

"No, Who ... "

He was pining for the fjords.

I guess Little Willy, Willy won't....go home.

So you can't board a plane dead. Anyone know if you're allowed to fly if you expire while you're waiting for the plane to take off? Because they certainly give you enough time to do so.

the two aforementioned ladies were listed as among the 'worst persons in the world' last night with Olbermann....

I'm not sure which implication is worse.


Either I share a sense of humor with someone from the NYT or he reads this blog and saw my first comment.

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