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March 09, 2010


Here's the inside story.


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I wish the monologue had more banjo duets.

I wanted more of Steve & Alec!

Did they actually use any of your jokes, Dave??? The Snuggies skit HAD to be your idea!

i just read somewhere that the jokes were as old as when paul lynde wrote them. that cannot be true.

I have to say, I have not laughed so much at a the Oscars since Billy Crystal was a host. You guys did a great job Dave. OK, I lied, I laughed at Jon Stewart's monologue too, but not as much as this years.

See, everybody gets all worked up about Obama's death panels, but no one cares about the joke death camp...

Dave, I looked for you around the Governors' Ball.

Mr Schwartzenegger was not amused.

Thanks for the Behind-The-Scenes peek, Dave. We lowly bloglits feel like we were there with you.
Very tiny, and riding awkwardly in your pants pocket - getting tissue fuzz and Altoid dust on us - but with you nevertheless.

Steve, we care...it's just too painful to talk about.

Excellent piece. I loved reading about the first time Dave was one of the writers for the show, and loved this one too.

Would have liked a joke about Edgar though.

I thought it was very good except for the Farrah thing. Tacky decision on someone's part

I guess I won't be able to read these columns anymore. I don't want to break my record for never having registered for a news website.

What Hammie said...

And it would have been nice to see Edward Woodward and Zelda Rubinstein too. I'd rather watch "The Wicker Man" or "Poltergeist" than "The Wiz" any day...

I thought the show had all the elements of a formal ceremony recognizing the excellence of professionals in the film industry, but without the BBQ and beer.

I loved the "Jew Hunter" joke at the beginning.... "You've hit the mother lode!"

I mean, you have to have at least one Jewish joke at the Oscars... come on!

Dave, did she winnie?

Dave is Mrs. Blog should ask you if SJP was thinner than her the correct answer is, " No! She's a cow compared to you!" I like the helium joke. Also I imagine there were people in the Greeen Room going, "OMG! It's Dave Barry!" I know I would have said that.

And yet when an ordinary person tweaks his monologue in public, they call the police.

Amber, that was my favorite joke. I literally *snorked* at that one.

This is funny because if I ever actually met Dave, all I'd be able to do is squeak like a tiny mouse or a caught Republican.

I'm getting a 404 on the link, alas.

Dad-O-Lot, you may find this site helpful.

it's fixed now, richard :)

Dave, if Mr. Steve Martin is still editing the monologue tell him the Snuggie shot was wonderful but has he thought about having Roger between them on the sofa also in a Snuggie? It will drive him crazy.

Steve, I feel the same way. Dave would probably look at me and start thinking of a telethon that could help me. I would be a speechless mess.

Sho' 'nuff. Thanks, Judi.

many years ago, I was at a free USO concert at lovely Rhein Main Air Base, featuring Loretta Lynn. after observing me mouth every lyric as she sang, she turned to me and asked if I had any requests. I promptly turned into a blushing, drooling idiot and replied..... "uh, uh, uh, uh." so "when" (if) I ever meet his dave-ness, I already know how I'll react! I've seen the future, and it ain't pretty.

Gaseous element jokes aren't getting the laughs this year anyway.

I thought Lucy did an exellent job.

(Actually, I missed the show, but the column was great. I knew there would be one coming.)

Hasta la vista, Punkin.

cindy, meeting Dave was nothing. I started *squeaking* when I met Meanie.

I hear a lot of women scream when they first meet Meanie, Siouxie.

Well...it was hot and my feets were sweating so my shoes were squeaking...but yeah..Meanie's a scream! I mean..I'd scream for Meanie. Or at him, anyways.

Good job as always, Dave!

However, as a woman, I reserve the right to state that I would rather gargle with Drano than have Alec Baldwin so much as glance in my direction. Now Steve, on the other hand . . .

Y'all won't squeak when you meet Dave. He makes you feel instantly at ease.

Well, as at ease as one can be just having wet themselves.

Alec used to be kind of cute. Remember "The Shadow"? What happened?

Hey, even my mom screamed when we first met....

Maybe the jokes in the joke death camp could be taken out and put into the blog?

Great column!

I was there when Dave ate the chicken in the green room. Actually, it was chicken salad in little cone. And yes, he raised his pinky.

Omaha Bridget, were Penelope Cruz and Julia Roberts all over him? Inquiring minds want to know.

I LOVED the helium joke!

And *snork* at monologue tweaking.

And, Alec Baldwin can do anything he wants in my general direction... or specific direction... just about...

Seriously not crazy about Alec ...but I LOVE LOVE LOVE Steve Martin. I'd squeal like a caught Democrat if I ever met him ;-P

I absolutely agree Siouxie. Nothing would make me happier than to see Steve Martin sing 'King Tut'. That always makes me smile. As for meeting Dave, I will take appropriate precautions so as not to embarrass myself. I may even wear my new 24 t-shirt that I got free for buying season one of 24. I bought it for the shirt. It has CTU on the front and 24 on the sleeves. I hope he is not too jealous that I have this shirt.

Overall the show was great but I really found the clapping of Steve and Alec so close to their pick-up microphones to be very jarring and detracting.

Dave, Please help Mot and tell Steve & Alec to have their arms lengthened immediately. ;)

BTW, there are new photos of Dave behind the scenes with Steve, Alec and the writers. He's all dressed up in a tux. Doesn't look half bad, either ;P

Oh yeah...you have to click on the other headline on the right - Dave Barry's Oscar Experience.

Yay, we got a column! Thanks, Dave.

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