24

Here is where we stand:

Last week CTU headquarters was blown up by a bomb hidden in a car driven by Generic Islamic Republic President Sham's daughter Kayla, who was guided straight from the terrorist hideout to the CTU entrance tunnel by the crack CTU team. That's right: The agency responsible for protecting the nation from terrorism, through its own cluelessness, managed to get itself incapacitated by a terrorist bomb.

So now, with CTU even more dysfunctional than usual, there is nobody to stop the terrorists from bringing the Lethal Atomic Rods of Doom into Manhattan except our boy Jack Bauer, who has fully recovered from being stabbed in the stomach by his girlfriend Renee three hours ago and is now, we hope, going to swing into action, by which we mean something more than shouting into the phone.

Speaking of the terrorists: Kayla's boyfriend Tarin is apparently still one of them, since he set Kayla up to be disintegrated, although she managed to get out of the car just in time, so maybe they will still have Feelings for each other.

In subplot action:

Bill Prady, the world's most diligent parole officer, is hanging around asking Dana pesky questions about her ex-boyfriend Kevin. We have no idea where this subplot is going, but it refuses to go away, so we're starting to wonder if maybe Agent Walsh is a mole, seeing as how CTU is required by law to always have one on the payroll.

Edgar is still dead.

Be sure to stay tuned in the comments section after the show for the traditional impossibly quick analysis by The Amazing Steve, who we suspect is using time travel. Meanwhile, here's a scientific poll:

Do you think Dana is a mole?
	No.
	Yes, but you can't see it unless she removes her... Oh, IS a mole. Yes.
	If they use the mole plot twist one more time, I am going to shoot the writers in the head.
	Not that this would cause them to suffer any serious damage.
	Montpelier.
pollcode.com free polls

UPDATE: The terrorists set off a Dramatically Sparking Wires Bomb.

UPDATE: "Agent Skaggs?"

UPDATE: Phil can shut down all bridge and tunnel traffic into the city. Phil has that power.

UPDATE: Those terrorists are some BAD shots.

UPDATE: I love when they tell where the bad guys are using the o'clock system.

UPDATE: That guy is SO clearly fake that only a moron, or Hastings, would believe him.

UPDATE: Unless I am wrong.

UPDATE: This here is some really bad acting.

UPDATE: Check out Jack's tasteful bachelor apartment!

UPDATE: YES! CHLOE!

UPDATE: The lesson: Never get between a woman and her trunk line.

UPDATE: Meanwhile, Jack and the terrorists are setting a world record for Most Missed Shots.

UPDATE: It's a good thing everybody thought to bring along 67 million bullets.

UPDATE: Chloe has taken precautions.

UPDATE: Hastings does not appear surprised that a probation officer from Arkansas would appear at CTU headquarters at 5 a.m. during a terrorist attack.

UPDATE: Jack is hit! But it's only a bullet wound. He will be fine. This is the shootingest episode EVER. But it does lead one to ask how come Renee could find Jack in, what, 11 minutes, while CTU had to wait for Chloe to get into the trunk line.

UPDATE: Agent Walsh is definitely not following normal agent procedures.

UPDATE: Well knock us down with a feather. Agent Walsh IS a mole.

UPDATE: Next week: Jack is fine! And of course more shooting. Take it, The Amazing Steve.

Comments

[Jeff Meyerson]

Did he say a call box?

And can't anybody shoot straight, even Jack?

[danceswithvowels]

11:00 O'clock, Jack! I mean 4:12 AM!

[rahga]

Nice how Cole's infrared scope turns everything green... without actually highlighting the heat-generating terrorists.

[tropichunt.com guy™]

I'm sorry, but there wasn't enough shouting and shooting in that scene to placate me.

[Loudmouth]

Throwing brass, Yeah finally. Just can't hit anything.

[Diva]

What is UP with TypePoop tonight??? It hasn't done these kind of stupid things to me in ages.

[Siouxie]

They really need do some target practice. They all SUCK.

[Cassie]

Isn't that right, Victor?

[Jeff Meyerson]

Maybe if Jack had a Hot Tub Time Machine he could go back and get some better writers?

[danceswithvowels]

Yeah, Rahga. I think he got it at Toys-R-Useless.

[Pat]

"Nothing says romance like chicken tenders." I cracked up; I admit it.

[rockin01]

Here! I'm late, but I'M HERE! You have no idea what it took- I'm on the road this week. Whew! Uhh...what did I miss?

[Diva]

Better that than bras, Loudmouth.

[Cassie]

dances,
11 o'clock... wow they're channeling Airplane.

[kombatkoala]

But Wes, nobody on TV ever lives near the docks...

[tropichunt.com guy™]

Hi, Gennita!

(I already got the helping with homework thing done for the night...phew!)

[nursecindy]

Hi Gennita and Cassie. Tonight I'm having a Guinness. A good Irish beer for a bad Irish woman. I think I need to stop painting for a few days.

[Diva]

Hey, rockin! Kayla is an idiot, shooting with no blood, I think that covers it.

[Cassie]

Hastings does not to get say Dammit.

[Wes S.]

There is so much lousy shooting and stray gunfire flying around that everybody involved, including Jack, really ought to be wearing Imperial Stormtrooper outfits...

[LeDud]

I'm behind (that's what she said!) Whats the drink count ?

[Boris Badenov]

Does agent Bauer need glasses? He hasn't hit anything and has an automatic or semi-automatic machine gun...
and is doing drive bys???

I think the real hero is Chloe. If Jack dies, 24 will continue (pr should continue) with Chloe!

[Loudmouth]

You know it's sort of like the Alexandria container shipping docks,there's never anyone around. At this rate the bomb will blow up and the only people in NYC will be CTU flunkies.

[Mitch]

Lots of errant gunfire, rockin01.

[Siouxie]

hah! they're going to drown?? possibly from the swamps flooding in, right?

[Cassie]

Damn NSA got there fast.

[Pat]

NSA? What is it? It's an agency concerned with national security, but that's not important right now.

[danceswithvowels]

Heya, rockin. You missed an enormous amount of completely useless shooting. And a small amount of WDG-spawn.

[Wes S.]

Wait a minute. NYPD still hasn't shown up at the gunfight on the docks...and the freakin' NSA shows up at CTU within five minutes of the EMP because Jack called them?

[Cassie]

Chloe snark yay!

[tropichunt.com guy™]

I <3 Chloe. Leave her alone.

[homeybeef]

THE RODS

[Daniel Kolle]

Damn, Chloe.

[Diva]

Now THAT'S my Chloe!!!! :) :) :)

I <3 Chloe.

[Jeff Meyerson]

The guy's the mole, right?

Field Office of what? NSA has a New York field office.

Six inches of water in the basement?

*looks outside*

That sounds about right.

Why is Hastings talking like he's talking to Forrest?

[rockin01]

A fresh batch of cell phones! Nothing worse than a stale cell phone.

[Cassie]

"We got knocked down."

What other lyrics are they gonna use?

[Loudmouth]

Just listen for the gunfire.

[nursecindy]

You know considering they were all almost blown up just a few minutes ago, they look pretty good. Even their hair is in place.

[Siouxie]

Chloe pout!

[Gennita Low]

Tropic, so did you save the world?

******
Fill in the blanks:
Chloe without computers is like...?

[Jeff Meyerson]

The East River is "four square miles of real estate"?

Does that even mean anything?

New server boards!

[Pat]

New server boards. Heh.

[danceswithvowels]

*SNORK* @ Frank Heinous' "Can't say I'm thrilled with what you've done with the place."

Some nice snarking from Chloe, too!

The three most important things -- Locution, locution, locution.

[Siouxie]

Chloe can feex it! of course.

[Mitch]

Is that the Boy Wonder tampering with CTU's computer?

[Cassie]

Taser! Taser! Taser!

[Jeff Meyerson]

Taser him, Chloe!

[Loudmouth]

The internet can start a fire?

[Pat]

Where's the damned taser when you need it?

[Wes S.]

Uh oh. NSA Boy just hacked off Chloe.

[Boris Badenov]

Taser him, Chloe!!!!

[tropichunt.com guy™]

Chloe needs to come back with a gun and shoot him. Many times.

[Siouxie]

He'll be sorry...

[homeybeef]

WHAT IS WITH THIS SEASON? WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP MAKING CHLOE FEEL BAD?!

[Diva]

TASE HIM, CHLOE!!!! TAAAAAAAAAAAAAASE HIIIIIIIIIIIM!!!!!!!!!

Fargin' bastard. Like it's CHLOE'S fault that some idiot drove in with an EMP in her car???? Idjit.

[nursecindy]

You would think that CTU would have a back up generator.

[danceswithvowels]

Oh, yeah. We need to be up now, so we'll, uh, ..., prep it for diagnostics!

[Cassie]

Taser! Taser! Taser!

[Twoina]

CTU never learns. If they'd just listen to jack they could save the world. But nooooooo they have yto have to ignore Jack DUH!

[Siouxie]

Chloe going rogue!!

[Wes S.]

"What's Jack got to do, got to do with this?
What's Jack, but a secondhand agent?..."

[Pat]

Renee!! She made it to the apartment!

[Jeff Meyerson]

Freckles!

Jack's apartment is in the Blaine Hotel?

[homeybeef]

FRECKLES!!!

[Cassie]

Dude, Renee's going to go medieval on anyone trying to hurt Jack.

[Wes S.]

Good to see that Renee is over her little emotional crisis...

[Mitch]

"Do what you have to do." I thinking trouble is in the offing.

[Scuba Steve]

TASER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Pat]

Chloe's about to Start a Ruckus.

[Diva]

Chloe can do this - she can handle ANYTHING.

[Wes S.]

...Or is Renee just bipolar?

[Loudmouth]

Chloe just needed a little pep talk. How does a NSA puke deal with an M16 input device?

[ArcticAl]

Freckles is back in the saddle again with a pistol and Chloe is about to taser that computer geek. Good times!

[tropichunt.com guy™]

Chloe needs to go in wielding the power of ChloeSack™...IYKWIM.

[Phil]

At least I feel certain Chloe would HIT someone if she shot!

[danceswithvowels]

British Crystal had a "thought" in the back of a cab, innit. Brill!

[Brian]

Just get chloe a iphone--and all will be good

[LeDud]

Doesn't an EMP fry every micro-circut in the area? It take days to get that system working again. I'm sceptical and I'm microsoft certified.

[Jeff Meyerson]

This is so stupid.

But you knew that.

Where are the boats? The NYPD? The thousands of busybodies calling 911 when they heard 512 shots?

[Cassie]

Do you have the vector, Victor?

[Cassie]

Jeff, the cougar got them.

[tropichunt.com guy™]

Gennita, sadly, my super powers prevented me from saving the world...but they did let me get annoyed at the "24" writers a little bit. :)

[K-Doc]

Remember - this is one of the many deserted areas of lower Manhattan.

[Boris Badenov]

Off topic, but did anyone catch the syndicated movie
Phone Booth? The bad guy was Keifer. WHy can't Jack be a little more like that guy?

[Loudmouth]

Egotistical fools in government? Never. Does a perimeter go in the woods?

[Kate]

I was wondering how all of those phones were managing to work. However, maybe we'll get a Chloe rampage as the writers definately owe us some carnage.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Where's Milton? Collecting staplers?

Is the President having a nap?

[Wes S.]

I'd think an EMP would have fried every circuit in the building, right down to their wristwatches.

Unless NSA Boy has a whole new computer network in his kitbag, complete with wiring, I don't see how he'd be able to do anything...

[nursecindy]

Jeff, evidently the NYPD and the people of NYC no longer notice errant gunfire.

[rockin01]

Chloe just needs clearance, Clarence.

[danceswithvowels]

Renee's benzodiazepine's definitely kicked in.

[homeybeef]

GAAAAA! SUBPLOT!

[Mitch]

The lighting looks like they're on the bridge of a Klingon battle cruiser.

[Pat]

No offsite backup? Come on.

[Kate]

Neither would I after a few hours on this show.

[Wes S.]

I'm thinking all the Coleman lanterns scattered around must make Milton the Redneck Parole Officer feel right at home...

[Diva]

Those are some freakishly bright flashlights.

[ArcticAl]

So how many parole officers are working on an average Monday night at 2:30 am.

[Kate]

Budget cuts, Pat. :)