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January 28, 2010

PARENTAL UNIT OF THE WEEK SO FAR

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

Comments

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"Colorado Springs police Tased and arrested a man Wednesday afternoon after passing out drunk in a children’s play area..."

They ought to arrest reporters who let their participles dangle.

Why were the police drunk in a children's play area?

Dang, you beat me to it Howard.

"Joshua Alger, 28, had passed out drunk at a McDonald’s play area"

Geez, my kids burned out on McDonald's so long ago I didn't even know they served booze. Make my McTini extra dry there, Ronald!

I'm confuzzled.. Who was drunken?? The cops, the man or the children??

besides all that, that story was published in the most irritating font ever.

"Along with the original warrant, he was arrested on suspicion of assaulting a police officer."

I would have thought that the second item he was arrested for was fairly clear-cut, i.e. EITHER HE DID OR HE DIDN'T. Suspicion?

That is SO stupid! Everyone knows it would take FOREVER for a kid to bite off a face with those teensie baby teeth! Sheesh!

The kids were obviously from Alien.

They ate them with some fava beans and a nice chianti . . . f-f-f-f-f-f-f!

padraig: McD's doesn't serve booze, but Burger King will.

That King can be so uber-creepy when he's drunk, too.

Well, is Burger Doodle gonna sell beer, or are they gonna pretend to and merely offer Budweiser and Miller ...

And one commenter said it wuz OK if done "tastefully" ... I'd nominate that concept (tied to those brands) for Oxymoronicalness of the Day ...

Love the ad: "Here's to eating more veggies than you did yesterday..."

"Along with the original warrant, he was arrested on suspicion of assaulting a police officer."

So the original warrant was arrested too?

Signed,

Confused

Cheese it - the cops!

OT

Anyone else having problems with some of the threads??

/OT

My neighbor once told me that his kids didn't know he was drunk until they saw him sober. The name isn't familiar but this sounds like the same guy.

Siouxie - si.

Siouxie, you mean this kind of problem?

"The requested URL /dave_barrys_blog/2010/01/not-that-there-is-anything-whatsoever-wrong-with-it.html was not found on this server."

Maybe there was something wrong with it...

"Anyone else having problems with some of the threads??"

Yes.

I'm also having problems with the threads. I can't read the comments on the chicken thread. I blame Meanie and wiredog.

The police also allowed the Hamburglar to escape.

I also blame Weanie & Miredog for messin' up the blog.

And we wonder why print journalism is failing. Newspaper readers had to pay to read the opening sentence of that story.

De blog, it be broked.

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