HIGHER EDUCATION

(Thanks to our former co-worker Ed Fiol)

Comments

[Meanie the Blue]

Dang, man! Can't remember the number for 911 *cough*

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

"Could you bring some Funyons when you come to take my statement?"

[Annie Where-but-here]

...sheriff's spokesman Art Forgey...

He may not find your stash, but he knows a fake painting when he sees one.

[Annie Where-but-here]

...one of the men hit him on the head with a chrome firearm and that they took cash from his pocket and three to four grams of his personal smoking weed.

So they used blunt force?

[Hammond Rye]

*Loads shotgun*

[Jeff Meyerson]

Is that his "personal smoking weed" as opposed to his "primo selling weed"?

"Dave's not here, man."

[Hammond Rye]

*Validates Jeff's Geezer bus pass*

[queensbee]

far out. too stoned to know when NOT to call the cops. paging mr cheech and mr chong, because this stuff belongs in one of their movies.

[Annie Where-but-here]

I'm sure his homeowner's insurance covers it.

[trustf8]

Was He Them?

[MartiniShark]

Whoah, man, I can't call the cops - there's no eleven on this phone, bro!

[Cheesewiz]

"...when two men kicked in the door of the apartment."

Were these real men or pretend men?

[Siouxie]

BRILLIANT, DUDE!

[Jeff]

He wasn't as dumb as it appears. The story says "No arrests had been made in the case by Tuesday."

Not even the caller? I guess MJ is legal in Gainesville?

[oneblankspace]

One of the cookies that that page tried to load onto my computer (and probably did load onto yours) was a

PBCSPERMUSERID

cookie. Just where are the word breaks supposed to be?

[CJrun]

Jeff, they'll arrest the victim after they return him his stolen property.

[wiredog]

I don't think any of the blog ladies have initials "PBC"...

[insomniac]

the thing i like is the 45 minute gap before he called 911, during this time, he and his friends (a/k/a 'the brain trust') debated whether to call the cops and what to say to them...

victim: dude, they stole my weed, and beat me up!
friend: bro, that's harsh! call the cops, but don't tell them about the weed...
victim: why not?
friend:what?

[Tim in CSG]

Another Darwin Award nominee

[Guin]

Hey, wiredog, you and I are posting on Hesse's chat.

[wiredog]

♪ It's a small world after all... ♫

[nursecindy]

Once while working in the ER, I had a doctor and a patient get into a major fist fight. I blanked out on how to call 911. I absolutely could not remember how to do it for some odd reason. In my defense they were beating the crap out of each other right in front of me and it's not often that a doctor does that to a patient. Plus they had knocked me to the floor. I finally called 911 and both were arrested and another ER doctor called in to replace the one in the pokey. The plus side was it sure did empty out the waiting room and I didn't have much to do the rest of the night. Third shift's in the ER can be fun. btw, I was not on drugs.

[Mercutio of Verona]

FAR OUT, MAN!

Personally, I believe this man was channeling Cheech and Chong at the time:
"Hey, Mr. Pig, man, some guys just kicked in my door, man, and that was pretty far out, man, and then they stole my stuff, man, and they, like, ran away with it, man, and I was wondering if you could get it back for me, man..."

[EB]

They never do this in North Dakota...

PT : How'd I get to the State H..?

Doc: (next day) How many bowls were you doin' man?

I suppose it would make the trip more interesting, perhaps, longer??

EB
Keep driving slow, so they don't get suspicious

[Loudmouth]

Be a doobie:
Doobie high
Doobie a roach sharer
Doobie loaded up on Cheetos
Doobie a resident of MA or CA

and not a Don'tbie:
Don'tbie a d**k
Don'tbie bogartin' that joint my friend
Don'tbie callin' the fuzz.

Personal smoking weed. Har.

[Meanie the Blue]

Cop: Hi, sir, we --
Dude: High!!
Cop: We'd been called about ---
Dude: Weed!!
Cop: Someone's apartment was hit ----
Dude: Hit!!
Cop: Was anything taken from ---
Dude: Tokin'!
Cop: What in Hell!?
Dude: Inhale!!
Cop: I'm gonna have to ask you to come along, sir.
Dude: A bong!!.......

[Tash]

Wow, MTB man, I knew that was you before I even read your name, man.... We're channelin'

[Meanie the Blue]

Stash!!

[Siouxie]

*snork* @ Meanie - yer smokin!

[chaz schlueter]

in his defense...45 minutes SEEMED like 4 minutes

either that or the robber told him to wait one hour and to start counting to 100, and he just plain lost count