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August 31, 2009

ON THE OTHER HAND, AUTO ACCIDENTS ARE UP 4,500 PERCENT

Bridge smeared with butter to stop suicides

(Thanks to DavCat and nursecindy)

Comments

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Saw that yesterday. The only surprise is that it was China rather than Japan, home for most of the Asian wackiness stories.

Why is there no cheese in China?

A billion people; one of the world's oldest cultures, and no cheese.

You'd have thought SOMEONE once would've left a pot of milk out and then came back a month later and been hungry enough to eat it.

You want to confuse the waiter at the local Szechuan Palace, order your Kung Pao Chicken -- with cheese!

Suicide should be punishable by death.

It's hard to believe that the signs asking people not to commit suicide on the bridge didn't work.

So... they climb up, slip, and then fall to their death anyway? Must be a lot of reasons to kill yourself in China. Most likely, being forced to smoke and eat bugs.

It still sounds like a Looney Tunes...I'm picturing Wile E. Coyote with his feet going all directions as he hits the butter...

BonMot --
Curdled milk is seen as unappealing. Plus there is a pretty good percentage of Chinese people who are lactose-problematic. The combination made creating pizza a bit of a challenge back in the '80s.

"Bridge Guard Wong Man" was quoted. Maybe he's just the wong man for the job.

Those jumpers are toast. Just in a different way from before.

All the cats licking the bridge have now become a traffic hazard.

Now the traffic jams on hot days are caused by people stopping and cooking eggs on the bridge.

Hot Buttered Bridges WBAGNFARB

Also, TAAFT!

So the go to the bridge depressed and suicidal then leave depressed, suicidal, bruised and covered in butter?

Hey, works for me. I've returned from dates in the same manner.

i'll bring some lobstah, and lets get a pot of rice going. why waste good buttah?

what happens if they use I cant believe its NOT butter?

I'd like to hear more about those dates Hammie. Or maybe not. I wonder if they've thought about doing this on the Golden Gate Bridge?

A more enlightened society would send the suicidal to work in the mines.

Post a sign saying that potential jumpers will be immediately shot. If they are serious, they shouldn't see this as a problem. If they are wanting attention, they will be aware that that particular method is counter-productive.

Warning: Suicide attempt will land you in a jam.

I'm sure the smell of rancid butter will cheer them up no end.

您好面对黄油。(Simplified Chinese.)

In related news, bridges are now considered 100% more tasty than before!

Do they commit suicide better than they conduct a fire drill?

*tap* *tap* Is this mic on?

That'll cut down on the BASTE jumping.

The Ministry of Public Health has made them change to a polyunsaturated margarine spread for the lower triglycerides and hydrogenated oils.

So does greasing up real estate make it easier to flip?

This had butter work!

Parkay

snork @ bonmot's baste.

But it was the best butter.

What, they got no olive oil?

When they slip and fall of do they land butter side down?

Of course you need butter for your "Last tango in Guangzhou"? It helps cut down on those rear end collisions.

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