YOU CAN'T BE TOO CAREFUL

So Warren police on Monday shot a Taser electroshock weapon — hitting what turned out to be a large toy cougar right in the stuffing.

(Thanks to Jimmy Madigan)

Comments

[Margaritaville]

Be vewey qwiet...I'm hunting cooogars.

[nursecindy]

A little taser happy maybe?

[Layzeeboy]

I had a cougar stalking me in a hotel bar the other night. I would have tasered her wrinkly ass had I had one. She wasn't stuffed but I think that was her intention.

[Diane]

Now, now, now, Layzee, show some respect for your elders. Would-be cougars have feelings, and like to be felt, too.

[boo]

What were they doing tasering something without knowing what it was anyway? Aren't they supposed to recognize and identify their target before shooting or tasering? Is it Detroit policy to just shoot something on general principles and then go see what it was they shot?

[nursecindy]

Diane, you're entirely too nice to Layzeeboy. *SMACKS* Layzeeboy twice. How do you know the cougar was stalking you? Maybe you were just getting in the way of her looking at a real man.

[trustf8]

Shame on that stupid cougar for stuffing her bra

[Siouxie]

Some cougars like to be teased...

ohh..tased

Nevermind.

[wiredog]

boo,
The answer to your last question is "yes", which answers the other ones.

[Layzeeboy]

nursecindy, OUCH!! BTW, we were the only two at the bar and she started out 10 stools away from me, then moved in for the hunt. It was either me or the 22 year old female bartender she was after.

I have nothing against cougars but Mrs. Layzee won't let me bring one home and keep her.

[Cheesewiz]

They use nerf tasers on stuffed animals. Less paperwork.

[nursecindy]

Sorry I was mean Layzeeboy and I understand about Mrs. Layzee not letting you bring cougars home.  Just curious though...how did you know the female bartender was 22 years old?  I'm betting Mrs. Layzee wouldn't believe that she followed you home and probably wouldn't let you keep her either. 

[Allen at Division]

"Cougar stuffing" are the most interesting parts to look at, though...

Siouxie, if the taser is set low enough, it could be a teaser... *G*

[nursecindy]

Hey Allen! You really think it could be a teaser? Let's try it on you first ;-)

[Siouxie]

Allen - what?? no 'vibrate' setting?

[Layzeeboy]

cindy, I just guessed at her age. She was obviously old enough to tend bar but young enough to not get my jokes. Mrs. Layzee would not believe that she followed me home (especially because it would involve a plane trip).

Siouxie - isn't a BOB just a tamer taser??

[nursecindy]

Do you think that Allen might be a little bit of a flirt Siouxie?  I'm beginning to wonder..

[Allen at Division]

Siouxie, it'll just tingle. I heard batteries don't last long...

[Allen at Division]

Cindy--I'm insulted! "A little bit", indeed!

[Siouxie]

I suppose you're right, Layzee. Zap away, then.

cindy, I can't imagine what would make you think that.

*eye roll* @ Allen.

[Allen at Division]

Don't you *eye roll* at ME, young lady!

*Sets Taser to "butterfly"...*

[Siouxie]

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[nursecindy]

Allen I was a nurse at the jail and I saw a lot of tasers.  I don't remember a butterfly setting on any of them.  Did I miss something?

[Allen at Division]

Huh. Cindy, maybe it isn't a taser after all. Siouxie, does it matter what we call it?

[Allen at Division]

The important thing is that it has a remote control...

[Layzeeboy]

Isn't that setting known as a rabbit? Meanie told me.

[Meanie the Blue]

I said "Bobbitt", not "rabbit".

[nursecindy]

Why don't we just call it a stimulus package or a bailout and leave it at that?

[Allen at Division]

Oh, Cindy, I got yer "stimulus package" right HERE!...

[Siouxie]

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

whut?

[Morgana]

Wow, leave you 'kids' alone for a couple months and your hormones go all crazy! It's a jungle in here!

P.S. That cougar was clearly ready to attack before it turned into a stuffed animal

[LisaP]

Can't believe no one has said that 'Tasered Cougars' WBAGNFARB...

[ken in sc]

BTW, there is no such thing as a cement drainpipe. Cement is a powder that you mix with water, sand, and gravel to make concrete. The difference between cement and concrete is like the difference between flour and bread. Some one who writes for a living ought to know this.