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May 22, 2009

CRIME DOES NOT PAY

Would-be gangster shoots off own manhood

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Comments

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Left him 'half-cocked': FIRST!

So he really does have dangily bits

True self-abuse.

It was more like boyhood anyway.

I think Jeff's very (really, we're not kidding) NSFW link would be appropriate here.

Is that gunsmoke coming out of your pants or did you have beans 'n chili for lunch?

Damn. The bot's still censoring us.

Jeff's link:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5255437014243567497

Except it didn't that time. Careful clicking on the links...

ok so i checked ron's dictionary + i screwed up on careered (thought it was carEENED), but is there ANY way 'crutch' = 'crotch'??

so did he shoot himself in the crutch or the crotch? One is significantly less painful than the other, from what I have heard. Iz r editurs learning to spell?

Is our gangsters learning??

I think not.

No more gang bangs for Lukas.

they saw that the gunshot had miraculously left his trousers intact.

Do they mean the bullet shot straight down his pants leg?? Must have been boxers. Never happen with tighty whiteys.

Men, never store a weapon with your favorite toy.

wiredog, I'm afraid Puppetry of the Pen!s will be beyond this guy's abilities (not to mention brainpower) for the foreseeable future.

cowprint: crutch in "English" = crotch in American.

Lukas Neuhardt, 27, had forgotten to put the safety catch on when he stuffed the gun into his trouser pocket to impress pals in Saarbruecken, Germany.

No proof, but I'm guessing Lukas is a single fella.

No mention if he was shooting off his mouth at the police. You know if I were a guy and was going to stuff a loaded gun down my pants, I would remember to put the safety on. And may I say "Thank you." to Jeff for all the translating he does for us. When are these foreigners going to speak english? Don't even get me started on the metric system.

crutch

2.Something that supports, often used negatively to indicate that it is not needed and causes an unhealthful dependency; a prop

yep. Crutch = crotch

I applaud this guy for not relying on others to accomplish his goals.

"crutch in 'English' = crotch in American.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 22, 2009 at 09:17 AM"

So do British people laugh when an American says, "I was on crutches for three months after the skiing accident"?

And don't get them started on men wearing suspenders.

Crotchless knickers have the same meaning in England as in the US. Crutches are things you need when your legs are f&$@*d, whether you're in Britain or America.

so he put a gun to his head?

oh, SO CLOSE to being a darwin!

Wow, he could use that as a crutch. Impressive.

Guns don't kill d!cks, d!cks kill d!cks.

And may I say "Thank you." to Jeff for all the translating he does for us. When are these foreigners going to speak english? Don't even get me started on the metric system.

Posted by: nursecindy | May 22, 2009 at 09:26 AM

Thanks, cindy, I knew all those trips to England over the years would pay off.

Actually, when I sent this is this morning, I added:

(Note to nursecindy: crutch = crotch.)

ISIANMTU

Thanks again Jeff. I think I need to get out more. I've been to Asia but never to Europe. It's on my to-do list.

*snork* @ cg!!

Yep - bang to the wang

Could this in anyway be classified as a pee shooter?

3 year jail sentence ... and he won't be able to use his tool.

*ponders what his new gangster name will be*

Pee Wee?

um

HalfCock

Stumpy?

Bobbitt?

Stumpy sounds like someone who would need a

crutch

Siouxie, Stumpy was my first thought. Considering what he did though, I'm thinking the guys in jail will just call him 'Stupid'.

Or, perhaps, "girlfriend".

Has to take it 'cause he can't give it.

OT

Tonight at 8 PM on the Discovery Channel "Mythbusters" according to TV Guide: "Claims that alcohol makes the opposite sex more appealing are tested"

/OT

NumbNuts would seem to be as good a gangsta name as any.

He'll really need to stimulate his package.

Hey maybe the iPhone's got an app for that?

Apparently he had a wee willy to match his pea brain. And thus did Lukas become Lucille ... and also an instant candidate for the next round of Darwin Awards:

http://www.darwinawards.com/

His "gangstah" name is Twenty-Five Cent

He's half the man he used to be . .

BWA HAHAHAHA !!! Where I come from, gangstas don't NEED to show off for their friends - they either survive their "jumping in", or the paramedics have to come get them.

Lukas Neuhardt, 27

Now pronounced "No Hard".

When the government outlaws shooting yourself in the crutch, only outlaws will be shooting themselves in the crutch.

"JACKASS: the German edition".

This. had. to. hurt. And then criminal charges to boot. Dope.

American Extender was designed as a very complex concept meant to boost male confidence by increasing the penis size, and improving sexual performance at www.AmericanExtender.com

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