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January 06, 2009

IS OUR PARENTS LEARNING?

(Thanks to Kevin Conwell)

Comments

How sad is your life when your crime spree is at a Dollar General store????

Wash cloths, garbage bags?

They need to take a workshop with the lobster-and-steak-thief guy.

"101 Ways to Be a Great Mom"
Chapter One - don't steal.

Dear oldmanatee----I thought the same thing.

That coulda been MY book....if I'd ever finished publishing it.

*snork* @ om!

BRILLIANT!

Thusly the seed of a new country song germinates and reaches to the Sun...

♪ I was drunk the night my ma got outta prison...♫

"And I went to pick her up in the rain..."

♬...THEN my dog died...♪

But before I could get to the station in my pickup truck...

OHhh...I just thought the dogs always died in c/w songs ;-)

"She got run over by a damned ole train!"

*All together, now*

"And you don't have to call me darlin', Darlin'..."

I did too, Siouxie. In that song, I always had the pickup truck running over the dog. That train sure was a surprise.

"You never even call me by my name!"

Woo-hoo, M'ville!

I like the line:

"If I said you had a hot body, would you hold it against me?"

My favorite country song line is:

"Save a horse, ride a cowboy"

(and I, thanks to crossgirl, have the T-shirt!)

My favorite country song is: "Jesus Loves You, But I Don't"

Tempers the blow a bit....

Not much.

*snort* Clark! I never heard that one!! :D :D

At the Dollar Gen
With her shopping cart
She was caught red-handed
When she stole my heart

...♬..."I got caught ripping off Dollar General
those, your honor, are the facts
I thought it was the ninety-nine cent store
And forgot about the sales tax!" ...♬.

(maybe to the tune of 'grandma got run over by a reindeer'?)

To embellish oldmanatee's comment:
How sad is your life that your WHOLE FAMILY has an outing AND a crime spree at the Dollar General ????

...and you get caught?

And your boyfriend points at you and says, "Well, she gave it to me!"?

And he wasn't talking about the stolen goods....

stealing from the dollar store. a major criminal, yeah.

And then the dog dies??

No, the wife cheats first, then the dog dies.

...and then, at the line-up, they have you standing next to 3 Mormon boys in white shirts and ties, that they just yanked off of bicycles outside the station.

...and then everyone breaks out into a chorus of "Alice's Restaurant."

Well, speaking of country & western songs

Well, speaking of country & western songs

Well, speaking of country & western songs

Thanks, Annie - perfect !

Afkat, I was thinking of that one, too. Not three, though.

Tele - Cat R had a funny comment in there, too, that has disappeared. Something like "and your boyfriend points to you and says 'SHE gave it to me!'"

To which I replied - '...and he wasn't referring to the stolen goods.'

...and those comments are now back...the bot is playing a country song in my brain....

Yikes...I only clicked "post" once....Honest!!!

It appears that the newspaper person could writer "gooder" as well, havin' misspelled "cloths" as "clothes" ... merely bein' picky, as usual ...

Ok...who brung the posts back??

Riiiiiight, Afkat.

Play a country song backwards you get out of jail, you get your wife back, your dog comes back to life and the train whistles Dixie.

WOW - I think it's time I took a vic(odin) and lay down. All this bot bizness is making me crazy. Thank goodness for the monthly supply.

Why does the train ALWAYS have to whistle "Dixie" ?? Why can't it whistle - oh, I don't know - "California Here I Come" or "Oh Susannah" or even "The Yellow Rose of Texas" ???

Oh, and thanks, again, Annie. I really thought one of us was going crazy here. And all of the postings are really funny, except I look like I'm in some time warp or something because I keep posting stuff others have already said. *sigh* OK, back to my nap !

Have some more vino, Tel.

Would love to, Sio, but I'm all hopped up on vicodin now. *sigh*
I'll try to calm down, tho ...

Ah, Vicodin. Almost makes me want to have another root canal.

Or steal my daughter's wisdom teeth meds....

whut?

OK, true story time. I believe I must have been waited upon by her daughter today. I was buying leftover Christmas candy, at 75% off. So when the bag of Peppermint Bark (Yummy stuff!) rang up at $7.99, the clerk stopped and looked puzzled. "You'll have to help me out", she said, "I don't know how much 75% would be off of $7.99."

"Here's yer sign!"

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