THE MESSAGE: WASHINGTON BAD

Candidates (pretty much all of 'em) good.

Comments

[baligurl]

Golf balls are better than turkeys.

[Mr. Carlson]

With God as my witness, I honestly thought that politicians could fly.

[chuck]

Wow. Is it thursday night already? Where did the time go?

[chuck]

I think Judi posted this a bit early. She should definitely be fired.

[CJrun]

That yarn reminds me of an old friend that got a great deal on a new Honda that had serious damage to the exterior from a hail storm; he just got a vanity plate for it that said "MAXFLI"!

[Larry Martell]

So is this then end of the daily columns? After the Olympics, the DNC, and the RNC, I've gotten re-addicted to frequent doses of you. My withdrawal when you stopped writing your weekly column was long and painful. I was finally on the wagon, then you started daily columns. It didn't take much to get fully hooked again. You cannot just stop now!!!!

[Suzy Q]

Is the a column from The Future? Because, as far as I know, the Republican convention's still going on. It may be the same convention that Herbert Hoover so proudly attended in 1928, but still. You get my drift.

Are the media allowed to leave before The Big Guy (whoever he may be) speaks?

[Doc Rick]

Don't worry about cutting out early Dave. After Govenor Hottie's speech last night I'm sure most of the delegates are headed home to. The ones who do stay will be snoozing 5 minutes into McCain's acceptance speech.

[Just Ducky]

*Flaps in for a moment*

Great column Dave, despite the premature extrapolation. Since you've gotten used to writing regular columns again, how 'bout you just keep 'em coming?

Oh, and Siouxie and Suzy Q: I have absolutely no knowledge of the previously mentioned bird p0rn or avian sex hotlines.

'Scuse me for a minute; my phone's ringing.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Poor Dave. After this week I guess Ike and Josephine will be a pleasant relief.

[Herr Rogers]

Can you say "Blitzkrieg"?

I knew you could....

[CJrun]

Heh! My spies tell me Dave is at the Mall of the Americas. I expect there's a story, there, or maybe he's gift shopping, so I won't mention which store.

[Punkin]

Dang! Whenever I travel into the future, all I see are our Chinese overlords herding us to our assembly lines.

[Annie Where-but-here]

It's the Republican convention. It was over before it got started.
*ducks*

[Cheryl Howard]

Ducks! Where?!

*thunk*

Ow. It sucks when your name is a verb.

[Meanie the Blue]

*Cancels plan for cheery session with Madame Vidalia*

[Cheryl Howard]

*waits for email from Just Ducky* ;-)

[CJrun]

OT\

My firewall has battled now two trojans in the last 10 hours. I don't p0rn surf or do other high-risk stuff. I updated to XP SP 3, today, but this began before I did that. The last source I can think of was a Java update that came out yesterday. Anybody else seeing this?

The files were ZCfgSvc dot excee and ifrmewrk dot excee.

End OT\

[Annie Where-but-here]

*Howards*

Nah. Doesn't have the same chill-factor.

I heard the Republicans were all invited up to Palin's place for a bear-hunt. The Wall Street kind.

[watchamerica]

go are house water me look tom

[Wall Street Bear]

*ducks*

[Annie Where-but-here]

me think watchamerica look stupid. me go put house on him.

[Kathybear]

Good to see you back Meanie....

[Gabriela]

hey I know you will think that i'm crazy (and I am lol) but the things is!!!

I'm Brazilian, lived in America back in 2005 (studying and learning some english ) and want your help :P
Myself and 9 friends are on a competition held by an brazilian airline company..we made a video , put on youtube and the most viwed video wins!!! We had over 10.000 in 4 days, but they (airline company) put our video in their channel on youtube and we lost our views (we still have them on our own channel but not in the new channel)..so we need as many views as possible!!! =) so if u could help in anyway!!!

Ah the winner group wins a 7 days trip to Miami (all included)! althouth most of us had been in Miami before, we want this trip so badly! It's not everyday that we can win a trip to Miami and with 10 friends!!!!Thank you in advanced!!!

The video is @http://br.youtube.com/watch?v=5J8c88FuhkI
And if u want to see that i'm real my facebook is http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=650430474

[Meanie the Blue]

Many thanks, K-bear (not Wall St. bear). Excellent to be here.

[Not My Usual Nique]

Hmmm...speech scheduled for 10:00 p.m., yet Dave covered it? Beam me up Scottie!

[Siouxie]

Dave must have borrowed the DeLorean again.

[Annie Where-but-here]

Being away from home that long, I don't blame him. Git home safe, Dave!

[slyeyes]

*double-checks by-line to see if it was written by Mitch Albom*

[CJrun]

Gabriela, will there be nudity (slap!)?

[CJrun]

OK, the only potential nudity is of guys, in the pool scene; you just lost half your demographic.

Plus, we don't speak Portagee, much less speed-read Portagee. Plus, it would really be a bad idea to try to go to Miami from Orlando, on I-95, because I-95 is nowhere near Orlando. Take my advice, as I'm an expert on directions to Miami from Central Florida. Take the back roads... there will be Giant Metal Chickens and a huge gator in the bar where you stop to take a break. You may have problems finding Miami, butt we're talking huge metal chickens and a big gator in the bar.

[Annie Where-but-here]

Ooooh, slyeyes, that was looow.

[Annie Where-but-here]

There's a banker in Nairobi who could probably help Gabriela out.

[slyeyes]

Don't get me wrong, I'm an Albom fan, too. (and not just because the guy is totally ripped).

And I think it's totally understandable that Dave wants to rush home before the next hurricane hits.

[CJrun]

They're dropping the golfballs now!

[Siouxie]

*ducking golf balls*

[Annie Where-but-here]

Ouch! THAT was a Titleist!

[fivver]

*raises umbrella a la Wil E. Coyote*
CRASH
*with pretty much the same result*

[Gabriela]

Well i actually think it's "funnier" travelling through I-95 instead of turnpike as we can stop by the cities and get to know them (A1A and US1 are slow, so these are roads that we try to avoid)...I know better way to go to Orlando is Turnpike, but I-95 is ok and when we get somewhere in Cocoa take 588, 528 (cant remeber it tho) and then 4 ... and we are in Orlando..

and wow, I don't speak portagee either(does this language exist?)

And i was just trying to get many views as we need to!!! as we had more than 10.000 views but we lost it, so we needed to starting again!

[CJrun]

Portagee is cowboy talk; it's not a real word, but tell that to a cowboy. You are right, of course, on the highway out of Cocoa (really Titusville, if I recollect); that's a straight shot into the South side of Orlando.

Still, you should consider Calle Ocho (U.S. 41, Giant Metal Chickens!) out of Miami and U.S. 27 going North (huge gator in the bar, old motels with funky signs!). I-95 is not Florida. Then again, you may actually want to get to your destination on time, butt I think that's just silly.

[Cheryl Howard]

I'm lost. Are we talking golf or Tom Tom?

[CJrun]

We're talking cowboys, Cheryl. It's fortunate that I was born 200 years too late, as I just can't ride a horse. They are always going up when I'm going down. However, I've always thought that I might be able to ride a cow, just fine. They go more side-to-side. Sure, I would have been the subject of ridicule at every camp fire and saloon, but I could handle that; heck, I consider Annie my Blog friend!

Plus, I would have that whole milk thing going for me, which does a body good.

[Wes S.]

From Dave's last convention article:

The Republicans are also feeling good about their message, which is that Washington is bad and whoever is in charge there needs to be run out of town on a rail. Interestingly, this is also the Democrats' message. We are now in our fourth consecutive decade in which both of our major political parties are just totally FED UP with Washington. I frankly don't see how Washington can survive this onslaught much longer.

Nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure...

[Wes S.]

Don't feel bad, CJ: I can't ride a horse either. The few times I tried, I fell off.

And I have flat feet, so cowboy boots are right out too.

And if I were to attempt to rope a steer, I'd likely tie myself in knots.

Perhaps we should form a support group...?

[CJrun]

I'm not against horses, per se, I just know them to be devils on hooves. I was trampled by a horse when I was 6. My Dad was once a jockey and we always had horses around. When I got run over, the story was that Solo, a retired race horse, went a bit nuts and my brother couldn't control him. My Dad accepted that; Solo was difficult. My questions, after I got out of the hospital, regarding what exactly Solo was doing on the front porch, fell on deaf ears.

I think that brother has always had it in for me. We were bored kids, growing up in Laos, so he used to take me up on the roof over the second story, where we would throw GI Joe, Ken, and Barbie off, with handkerchiefs attached for parachutes. Surely he knew I was smart enough to make a quick mental calculation and think I could do the same thing with a tablecloth attached to my back. He's very sneaky, that one.

[queensbee]

the closest thing i came to horse riding was having one of those toy horsehead things on a stick, circa 1950-something. do they still make those? the horsehead was some kind of patent leather. i'm pretty sure horses dont come in patent leather, even tho we didnt have them in queens.
i trust dave's coverage of the GOP since i didnt watch it. [they give me the vomitations.]
how tough would it be to have a regular column, huh, dave??? you're needed!!

[Cat R]

Slinks in®

Annie, please change that to Breastleist.

CJ, Breastusville.

Let's keep things clean around here.

*puts out coffee, bagels and bacon*

[Meanie the Blue]

Cat - please change "puts out" to "serves".

Thanks for the goodies.

[Allen at Division]

"Portagee" dates back to the 1800's, meaning Portuguese immigrants in America. It's one of those words that is sometimes used and perceived as a slur, and sometimes as a term of endearment. You'd better know a person before you call him/her that word...

[Margaritaville]

There was a convention?!

[KJP]

I don't know if Ben actually said that. But he should have.

[Annie Where-but-here]

Allen's right - 'Portagee' better be served with love when you say it. Just like 'redneck,' lest you wanna wear the nearest ditch.

As for horses, CJ, they are great judges of character. Cows, too. They are even tougher to ride - extremely bumpy gaits. Yes, I've done it.

Queensbee - that's a 'stick pony.' My boys have one, so they're still made. They use it to smack each other. Boys, sheesh.