HALLELUJAH HEADLINE OF THE DAY
(Thanks to emkay)
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September 04, 2008
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A bit religious, but at least not political.
Go Cops!
Posted by: Diane | September 04, 2008 at 08:50 AM
Aww.
Posted by: Elon Weintraub | September 04, 2008 at 08:51 AM
"You could tell he was serious. There was no joking around, and I knew he wasn't kidding," Anderson said.
"Because most days guys flag us down and pretend their wives are giving birth in the car."
*eye roll*
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | September 04, 2008 at 09:01 AM
...who the couple named Jesus.
1) Jesus is pronounced "Hey, Sioux!" and
2) It should be "whom the couple named Jesus."
*double eye roll*
Posted by: Dr. Bob | September 04, 2008 at 09:03 AM
First a stable. Now a service station. What's next for the baby Jesus? A spaceport?
Posted by: Bãrön vønKlýff | September 04, 2008 at 09:09 AM
Did the baby Hey-Sioux(s) get gifts of premium, unleaded and regular?
Posted by: Lairbo | September 04, 2008 at 09:15 AM
wait a minute - what about the 3 wiseguys -- arent they supposed to be there???
Posted by: queensbee | September 04, 2008 at 09:16 AM
"There's no room at the Inn, but Motel Six left the light on for ya."
Posted by: Punkin | September 04, 2008 at 09:20 AM
Officer Anderson and Officer Kroutil thought the logical next step would be to buy Jesus some new clothes.
What? No gold, frankincense and myrrh?
Posted by: Not My Usual Alias | September 04, 2008 at 09:30 AM
*remembers previous post about going to hell and refrains from comment*
Posted by: pogo | September 04, 2008 at 09:31 AM
*busy picking up Dr. Bob's rolling eyes* Amen!
Posted by: eilbeback | September 04, 2008 at 09:33 AM
Cute handbasket, Punkin.
Posted by: Bãrön vønKlýff | September 04, 2008 at 09:33 AM
"the honor of clamping and cutting the umbilical cord..."
Honor?!
"No, go ahead, be my guest."
"No really, it's your honor."
"No, no, no, I insist."
"No, after you."
"No, after YOU..."
Posted by: Allen at Division | September 04, 2008 at 09:39 AM
I thought Labor Day was Monday.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | September 04, 2008 at 09:42 AM
*
looksfeels around for a hat to pass, but finds only a handbasket* AAAA-men!Posted by: Dr. Bob | September 04, 2008 at 09:48 AM
I wonder if he was conceived in the back seat, too.....
*Whistles and shouts* "Hey, handbasket! Downtown Hell, please. And hurry."
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | September 04, 2008 at 09:51 AM
"Cute handbasket, Punkin."
Why thank you, I made it myself.
Posted by: Punkin | September 04, 2008 at 09:51 AM
I dunno, "the Virgin Brenda" just doesn't have the right ring to it.
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | September 04, 2008 at 09:53 AM
*Upgrades to 15 passenger, high speed handbasket. You know you're in trouble when you get on - there are only 14 cup holders!*
(Eerie music here)
Posted by: Punkin | September 04, 2008 at 09:55 AM
Dibs on the backseat.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | September 04, 2008 at 10:02 AM
Handbasket contents after 1 pass:
• 23 cents (1 Canadian penny)
• beer bottle top
• paper clip
• gum wrapper
Posted by: Dr. Bob | September 04, 2008 at 10:03 AM
Hey back!!
Does this mean we're all SAVED and not going to hell??
Dr B?? shouldn't that be (triple)AAA-men?
*jumps into Punkin's handbasket* I call SHOT GUN!
oooooo purty
Posted by: Siouxie | September 04, 2008 at 10:03 AM
hail brenda
full of grease...
('cause it was at a gas station...ooh, look at the shining new handbasket!...wait a minute, those cup holders are for... my soul! aaaaaahhhhhhhh!)
Posted by: insomniac | September 04, 2008 at 10:05 AM
Ya know? Mary doesn't look anything like her pictures.
Posted by: Siouxie | September 04, 2008 at 10:09 AM
Make sure you have this handy Catechism with you in the basket . . .
(and scooch over, this thing is getting crowded)
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | September 04, 2008 at 10:12 AM
"Jesus is pronounced "Hey, Sioux!"
Not true. Jesús is pronouced "Hey, Sioux". That accent is very important.
Posted by: Elon Weintraub | September 04, 2008 at 10:15 AM
ding dongs, they were supposed to wrap the baby in swaddling clothes, not discount clothes.
pssst, doc bob, if you're not gonna use it, can i have my bottle cap back?
Posted by: crossgirl | September 04, 2008 at 10:17 AM
...and the only c.d.s in the handbasket are from manilow!
Posted by: insomniac | September 04, 2008 at 10:19 AM
I tried to buy some myrrh once, but they had never heard of it at Wal-Mart...
I guess you have to go to one of those fancy smancy specialty shops.
Posted by: clark Kent | September 04, 2008 at 10:21 AM
Nooooooooooooooooooooooo, insom!
Ok..who's bringing the beer?
Posted by: Siouxie | September 04, 2008 at 10:22 AM
Nooooooooooooooooooooooo, insom!
Ok..who's bringing the beer?
Posted by: Siouxie | September 04, 2008 at 10:22 AM
Does this mean that Christmas is being moved to September?
Posted by: emkay | September 04, 2008 at 10:23 AM
*smacks bot*
oohh..self simul...that tickled.
Posted by: Siouxie | September 04, 2008 at 10:23 AM
Jose Resendes told the officers he was looking for the hospital, but was having a difficult time finding it.
Duh. He shoulda followed the star.
Posted by: Siouxie | September 04, 2008 at 10:26 AM
*waits for E. W. to make it José*
Posted by: Dr. Bob | September 04, 2008 at 10:30 AM
on star?
Posted by: crossgirl | September 04, 2008 at 10:30 AM
José, can you see?
Posted by: Dr. Bob | September 04, 2008 at 10:33 AM
A bit religious, but at least not political.
Go Cops!
Posted by: Diane | 08:50 AM on September 4, 2008
Diane, little Hey Sioux is the backup messiah in case Barak loses the election.
*ooooh yeah! a political AND religious double!*
*does happy dance into the handbasket*
Posted by: fivver | September 04, 2008 at 10:35 AM
Mahatma, any catechism written by John Hardon can't be all bad. Just sayin'.
Posted by: ubetcha | September 04, 2008 at 10:40 AM
We're gonna need a bigger basket.
Posted by: pogo | September 04, 2008 at 10:40 AM
Hey fivver!
oh...nevermind
Posted by: Siouxie | September 04, 2008 at 10:47 AM
Happy Birthday, Jesus!
Posted by: Margaritaville | September 04, 2008 at 10:57 AM
"SLIDESHOW: Police Deliver Baby Jesus At NorCal Gas Station"
Eewww. I'm afraid to look.
Posted by: Mallomary | September 04, 2008 at 11:11 AM
"SLIDESHOW: Police Deliver Baby Jesus At NorCal Gas Station"
Eewww. I'm afraid to look.
Posted by: Mallomary | September 04, 2008 at 11:11 AM
Jeez, Siouxie, I told you I wuz bringing the beer! I hope someone brought a bottle opener.
Posted by: baligurl | September 04, 2008 at 11:21 AM
insom's post reminded me of how my daughter used to say it when she was a toddler...
"Hail Mary, full of grapes..."
Posted by: Cat R | September 04, 2008 at 11:26 AM
**snork** at Pogo
Posted by: nannie | September 04, 2008 at 11:26 AM
*snork* @ Cat's daughter!
Ya know, that makes more sense. Wasn't Mary the one that made Jesus turn water into wine?? The Virgin of the Vino is all I'm sayin'.
bali, got it..I'm bringing the boxes of wine.
Posted by: Siouxie | September 04, 2008 at 11:49 AM
OT
You read it here first: Detroit has a new mayor.
/ OT
Posted by: Steve Haller | September 04, 2008 at 11:54 AM
Should have been named "the Virgin Connie Swail"...
Posted by: Allen at Division | September 04, 2008 at 11:56 AM
For snacks, I'll grab a handful of schweaty balls.
And some potatoes on a stick - they're called "Crucifries"
*notices her handbasket seat assignment has been bumped up to First Crass.*
Posted by: Punkin | September 04, 2008 at 12:11 PM
I dunno. Didn't the real Jesus have long hair and a tightly trimmed beard like you see on Just For Men boxes?
Posted by: BoscoH | September 04, 2008 at 12:25 PM
SNORK@ Punkin's "crucifries!
Posted by: baligurl | September 04, 2008 at 12:49 PM
Can't wait for the baby Jesus to grow up because I need some woodwork done in my house!
Posted by: Anthony | September 04, 2008 at 01:25 PM
Is this basket big enough to seat everyone comfortably?
Posted by: Dorakay | September 04, 2008 at 02:29 PM
Could be - does it have air conditioning? Cause we're gonna need it.
Posted by: emkay | September 04, 2008 at 03:50 PM
There are shepherds in Modesto? Who knew?
Posted by: frodolives | September 04, 2008 at 09:26 PM
"All we are saying, is give Jesus pants."
Apologies to Gavin Edwards (who includes a cool cartoon of this lyric in one of his books)
>Officer Anderson and Officer Kroutil thought the logical next step would be to buy Jesus some new clothes
Posted by: Lady Mondegreen | September 05, 2008 at 03:03 PM