CSI: HO-HO-KUS

Moo.

(Thanks to queensbee)

Comments

[Mot the Hoople]

If you tell me there's also a place called Po-Po-Kus I won't believe you.

[rob]

MOO!

[Siouxie]

Hey Mot!!!

Give it up for "The Runaway Bovines"

[Annie Where-but-here]

There once was a cow from Ho-ho-kus,
Who fled thru a fence that was brokus.
Then a rope grabbed her neck,
And she said, 'What the heck?'
'I mooved 'cause that bull's tryin' to focus.'

[Siouxie]

*snorkus* @ Annie!!

[Cheryl Howard]

Well we're moo-vin on up,
To the east side.
To a deluxe apartment in the sky.
Moo-vin on up
To the east side.
We finally got a piece of the pie.

[Lairbo]

It was a Jersey cow, right?

[klezmerphan]

Shouldn't that be spelled Ho-Ho-Cows?

[pogo]

Didn't Ho-ho-kus mean "Closed on Sunday" in Mohecan?

[queensbee]

and snorkus at siouxie snorking at annie.
and i drove past hohokus on my way back into nyc from binghamton when i was in grad school.... there's a whole bunch of really weird place names in new jersey. they might be native, or they might be dutch... or just whacky.

[Annie Where-but-here]

I thought it meant 'eye shadow of many colors.'

[jon]

Everyone should stop making fun of her!
She was just on her way to a campaign stop for her running mate!!

[Jacki]

There once was a bull from Weehawken
At a large lass he was gawkin'
Til along came a gal with a lariat, saying
"You ain't getting milk 'til you marry-it"

Maybe?

[Cheesewiz]

Annie:

Suggested change to last line:

There once was a cow from Ho-ho-kus,
Who fled thru a fence that was brokus.
Then a rope grabbed her neck,
And she said, 'What the heck?'
'I mooved 'cause that bull's tryin' to pocus.'

[SW]

I'm a walkin' in Ho-Ho-Kus
Need a cab or grab a bus
Wonderin' who its owner might be
On the streets of New Jersey
My liver runaway
A run run run run, runaway

[Jeff Meyerson]

Ho-Ho-Kus has always been one of my favorite names of towns.

And wouldn't 400-Pount Bovine BAGNF Roseanne's new talk show?

*ducks*

[Diva]

Bingo, Cheese! :) Excellent shift. And an excellent start by Annie. :)

[SW]

The running of the bulls, Joisey style.

[Annie Where-but-here]

Thanks, Cheesewiz. Since it was a Jersey cow, I was going for the crude NJ accent humor, hence 'focus' didn't involve eyesight.

Judging from your name, though, I'm sure you have the inside scoop on cow humor. :)

[Hammond Rye]

"Old MacDonald had a farm! E-I-E-I-O!

And on that farm he had a cow! E-I-E-I-O!

With a ...

I said, With a ...

Ok, Cut! Cut! Somebody give the cow her lines, please! We're wasting daylight!

Whattaya mean the cow's gone? This is Jersey, not Texas! What did she do, call a taxi?

Fine, fine! Somebody call 911 and report her missing. Will someone go to central casting and get a stand-in? And will someone pleeeeasse get me a latte'?"

[SW]

"The 400-pound bovine was spotted on Hollywood Avenue Thursday night."

You see all types at Hollywood and Bovine. [Not sure if that's a regional joke or not.]

[Cow]

Who you callin' ho-ho?

[SW]

"The 400-pound bovine was spotted on Hollywood Avenue Thursday night..."

...but by Friday morning, it was striped.

[clark Kent]

So THAT'S where my cow went!

It's always the last place you looked. Ho-Ho-Kus? Pretty sure that would have been the LAST place I would have looked....

[Siouxie]

LOL @ Hammie & stevie!

[SW]

A stone's throw from Cadab-ba-bra.

[Kathybear]

Didn't Ho-ho-kus mean "Closed on Sunday" in Mohecan? No - that's Paramus. And shouldn't the cow have been kept on a farm in the first place?

[Meanie the Boss]

Oh, the Parkway's jammed with broken fenders so that last stupid cow would survive
Everybody's out on the road tonight
But there's no brand on your hide
Together Bessie we will find out your address
We'll stare at you with that ravenous look you know

Ho-Ho-Kus!
Someday girl I don't know when
We're gonna get to that grill
Where we really want you to go
And we'll smoke in the sun
'cause you know tramps like you
Baby you were born for a buuunnnnnnnnn

[Annie Where-but-here]

Many cows don't stay down on the farm. Especially on Friday nights.

[Cheesewiz]

Oh Annie, now that I can hear the accent, I like yours better.

[queensbee]

well, noo joisey fans i found some great place names, so keep those rhymin skills handy...
how about:Cheesequake [pronounced Che-say-oh-key) meaning upland, from a native language; or
Nixon - named for a ship builder
or Nummytown, named after an indian chief.
there's also Spermaceti Cove - named for whale oil.
and Ho-Ho-Kus actually means 'red cedar'.
lots of dutch and indian names.
so have at those quatrains. [i'm a researcher, not a good poetess]...
OR - you could come over to NY, where we have such melodious places as Popes Ravine, Fishs Eddy, Fink Hollow, Butts Corner, and Bovina Center.
Hey, maybe that cow was just trying to get back homeward.

[Hammond Rye]

*Waves at Siouxie!!!*

[Elsie the Cow]

I just got tired of everyone grabbing at my teats and decided to take a break. Can I get an "A-men" sisters?

[Siouxie]

*WAVES back @ Hammie!!!*

How YOU doin'?

[Siouxie]

Quittin' time!!

*opens blog bar*

Happy Hour!!! Laters

[Elmer]

Elsie, get back here.

[Margaritaville]

How can you not notice your cow is missing?

[Diva]

Ah, Blue. BAD, but so good! Reminds me of this classic.

[pogo]

M'ville - The article doesn't really mention the breed. If it was a dairy cow, milked twice a day, the owner would notice it was missing. Beef animals are not checked that often or that closely. One of a herd might not be missed for days.

[Margaritaville]

Ah. I wondered. Well perhaps if the farmer watches the news, he will be reunited with his cow at last!

[Diva]

Maybe someone lost her in a high-steaks poker game.

[Annie Where-but-here]

*lights bbq in Meanie's honor* Bruuuuuuce!

If it's really just 400 pounds, it's a youngster that wandered off. They're very easy to miss. Ours would wander all the time. We always found them down at the baseball field, watching a game.

Because diamonds are for heifers, you know.

[Meanie the Blue]

I'm sure with all this publicity, all will soon be re-vealed.

[queensbee]

annie - long way to go for that punch! haaaaaaaa!

[Siouxie]

LOL Annie. Udderly groanable ;-P

[Ednausean]

She was headed for The Ho Ho Kus Inn for their 'grazing' menu. Then on to Dairy Queen for a MOO LATTE

[Ednausean]

Townfolks were udderly confused, what with trying to avoid those cow pies?