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September 28, 2008

CSI: CHESTERTON

When informed that she would be patted down by the officer, Yeakey unbuttoned her pants and pulled out 10 DVDs, a Play Station video game, a pair of white tube socks, a black and red bra, a black and red pair of women's underwear with the word "pouty" printed on them, three pairs of size 4T boys underwear and two women's rings.

(Thanks to DavCat)

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HEY! She prolly reallllly needed the underwear!

...and a partridge in a pear tree...

And that's why they call it booty.

Does this stolen merchandise make my butt look big?

She was taken to Porter County Jail, which has no death row.

Swiss Army Pants!

This seems like something right out of a David Zucker movie. I expect Frank Drebin was the officer offering to pat her down?

And SNORK at WriterDude!

She pulls out
Lipstick, powder, bubble gum and bobby pins
But she can't find her keys "her keys"
Curlers, tweezers, cold creme and candy bars
But she can't find her keys "her keys"
Nail file, school books, an autograph of Fabian
She can find with ease
But I'm standing here waiting for a goodnight kiss
Cause she can't find her keys
===========
She pulls out
Gumdrops, glasses, magazines and tangerines
But she can't find her keys "her keys"
Presley records, hair spray and jelly beans
But she can't find her keys "her keys"
Eyebrow pencils, perfume and potato chips and portable batteries
But I'm standing here waiting for a goodnight kiss
Cause she can't find her keys
==========================
She pulls out
(Frozen custard, piano bench, pretzels and a monkey wrench
Tennis racket, army cots, pumpkin seeds and coffee pots
Watermelons, goal post, a rabbit's foot and French toast
Fire hydrant, ash can, TV set, electric fan
BUT SHE CAN'T FIND HER KEYS!!)

Geezer Snork @ SW.

So the problem was she was in the 10 items or less line?

Go Gators Jags!

Attention K-M@rt shoplifters, special deals for Pouty underwearers in Cell Block D.

(can't imagine where she stashed all that stuff)

What? no kitchen sink? Amateur.

I give her props for stealing getting matching bra/panties.

That girl's got some junk in her trunk.

Somebody find out if she's got the Broncos' run defense in her pants, too, because it sure isn't at Arrowhead Stadium right now.

WD - yeah, they're in there. But it say Pouty on them.

Pouty Underwear? Is that the new Paris Hilton line?

*Snork* at SW! I've never heard that song before.

You usually don't hear about women putting socks down their trousers.

In their bras, however...

"kids...mom has been arrested. also, there will be no xmas presents for the next 3 to 5 years."

They didn't confiscate her shiv? Watch out snitches at the Porter County Jail! ("Which doesn't have the DEATH PENALTY??? WTFBBQ!?!?!?!?!)

Great, they arrested the only customer K-Mart had all day.

I need bigger pants...and the urge to theft/thieve-steal. I'd never have to buy underwear for my three guys again. I wouldn't have to do it often. They wear until them (the underpants) are only elastic and waistbands. I recently found my 15 yr. old was still wearing a boys size 12. He's in a 31/32 waist. It's a wonder his feet haven't fallen off. Does explain some of the attitude. I know I'd be pissy if my undies were that tight.

them, the underpants, until they are---you knew what I meant!

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