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August 20, 2008

THIS CAN'T BE GOOD

Cats in tanks.

Catplaytank

Also, planes.

Catplayplane

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Comments

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Resistance is mewtile!

Suck UK's joint managing director,

THAT has got to be the worst job title ever.

French cats immediately surrendered.

Mutha uckin' cats on a mother uckin' plane.

Those are Chinese Happy Meals.

just don't let the squirrels get hold of this technology...

*snork* at CJ.

A cat can now be in a dogfight.

Gah -- DOGS! That was supposed to say, "French DOGS immediately surrendered". Damn ringing phone rushed me into a brain fart.

CJ: Chinese Happy Meals? BWWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Slinks in®

Thinking outside the box?

In other kitty-related news, the spaghetti-eating cat photo has been explained by Fox.

Watch the clip from "The Soup" and then check out "the FOX spokesperson's response". We report, you deride...

We have a kitten at our house who likes to hide behind the door so she can jump out and grab your ankles as you go by....

We feel she must have had some Ninja training.

It's best to act surprised and terrified, even if you see her peeking around the corner. Wouldn't want to give her a complex...

clark, dress the dog as a pirate.

Clark, if you live in California you might want to try out for "Housecat Housecall". This is a show that airs Saturday at 9 AM (repeated Sunday at 7 AM) on Animal Planet. A very pretty vet comes to your home and helps you out if your cat likes to join you in the shower (the cartoon kitty in the opening credits is delightful), sneak food off the table or claw your sofa. Upload a vid of your little attack kitty on their website and you could be next...

Some where Samual L Jackson is on the phone with his agent.

It's really not a problem, though.... She doesn't use her claws.

She just sort of hugs your ankle and hangs on. Not sure the appeal for her....

I like the pirate idea, though.

Why not just get her her own leg?

Hey, that's a good idea!

I know a guy at the mall who has an artificial leg too. Now I just have to think of a way to distract him long enough....


clark - a mineral oil spill in front of him might do it.

And tomorrow, the cat in the tank will invade Soviet Georgia, all the while singing "tanks, for the memories...."

I'm thinkin' I'll stick with Steve Martin's cat handcuffs. I don't trust 'em.

Just hand over the tuna, and nobody gets hurt.

KEY QUOTE: "these are just about the most fun cardboard boxes you will find"

As a guy, I can say, with NO reservations, that this quote evokes some visuals that I am going to end up taking to my grave... Please, Lord, May the grave come early!!! TAKE ME NOW!!!!

Exciting 12 hour old Olympics coverage beginning soon.

Women's Beach Volleyball bathing suits who will win?!

Mens 200m, will it be Usain Bolt or Michael Phelps?!

Extreme BM - I don't think I want to watch that....

I'm getting a stealth bomber one for my sneaky kitty.

Sio, did you mean to post that back on the Thigh-Master thread?

CJ,

I got one up on you! I got Michael Phelps on my fantasy football league!!! (I'm not SURE why I drafted him... it just seemed right!)

(P.S., I don't even know if Michael Phelps can convert meters to yards, IYKWIM, AITYD)...

A cardboard box that costs 15lbs&tradethingy. May I sell you an expurgated hairball to go with?

Steve, thanks for the Spaghetti-Eating Kitty, which I had somehow missed. I did catch a little of that Mike & Juliet show while stuck in a doctor's office one morning and it was surreally awful, so I'd believe someone did it as a joke.

Pretty funny.

Annie is making her play for her own stall at the Silk Market.

Speaking of Michael Phelps, I'm wiping a tear from my eye. I LOVE this guy!

Flabby-butts that think they can sit around and eat Wheaties bore me. This guy says, "eat what you like and get off your @ss!"

Cardboard box: £ 15.00

Jar of vaseline: 3.95

WhatEVER: PRICELESS!!

OK, Olympics coverage that's 12 hours old, already, and there have been 40 minutes of Gals Platform Diving, qualifications round. NBC has completely won me over. Maybe, next will be 2 hours of Extreme BM, because some people may not have ESPN 2, 3, 4, etc.

I always go straight to the Olympics if I want to watch kids on banana-seat bikes take jumps. Maybe they'll go around in a circle! Maybe they'll go up in the air off a bump! Tune in now!

Good story, CJ. Perhaps instead of going to Dizneyland, he'll opt for here instead.

*TOTAL SNORKS* at Annie!!! I'm going to "dictionary.com" to see if "expurgated" is ACTUALLY a word! (Siouxie asked me to make sure...)

Can you imagine what would happen if Ozzy Osbourne went on Mike and Juliet? That poor cat would be bouncing around like a ping pong ball...

Just google the word, frodo. Google will point to this page, and that will prove it's legit. Circular logic at its best.

and by the way Frosted Flakes isn't half bad if you add enough sugar...

Hah! The Cuban hurdler is wearing a giant gold cross!

Wouldn't that catch on the hurdles?

"Expurgate":

1. to amend by removing words, passages, etc., deemed offensive or objectionable: Most children read an expurgated version of Grimms' fairy tales.
2. to purge or cleanse of moral offensiveness.

Thanks, bud, for teaching me a new word!

Shoot, now ya' got me gunning to teach YOU new words, but since you are a writer, I probably can't, and as much as I love the English language, you may as well borrow Siouxie's machete to (hopefully just teach me lessons in humility..., but I know her machete...)!

*sticks GIANT pin in AWBH voodoo doll*

Don't mess with me when they finally start showing actual Olympics, Track and Field!!

You call that a pin? You wouldn't last a minute west of the Mississippi.

Expurgate is a new word for the ESL folks.

I'm disgusted by the Usain Bolt film; little boy mugging for the camera stuff, not one single race film for us to watch. Go NBC!

*presses 'Barbs' button on Pin remote, adds Bob Costas doll*

I already know Bolt will run a 19.30, but I hate his sorry @ss. What a jerk.

Good Lord, that man is untouchable! For a jerk....

I used to be able to get past all that pomp and circus-dance the networks do and actually enjoy the Olympics. No mas. First you have commercials. Then you have the blathering Costas contingent. Eventually there's a bit of sport. By then I'm channel-surfing.

Well, it's official, Carl Lewis is no longer the biggest jerk in the history of Track and Field. Bolt is stunning, but a lousy person that wastes his breath saying so.

His value as a promoter for athletic equipment will be very limited. Yeah, everybody has a closet full of McEnroe tennis gear (not).

Bolt was so far beyond the best in the world, pulling away, he may even take the 400, after the 100 and 200.

*zaps in for a sec*

Annie, I THUNK it was pomp and circumcise all this time.


*btw..I am completely hooked on the Olympics...Costas and all!*

*zaps out*

*snork* @ Siouxie's concise 'circumcision.'

The real reason I never broke 2 minutes in the 800m. Gawd I love Skeeter's Big Biscuits! (Back then, I got well over 200, now I'm below 190)

Just sent to me by a college buddy and timing is everything. Honest truth, I shattered my ankle on the way to a late night breakfast and my roommate at UF pushed me home in a shopping cart. It hurt, but the honest truth is that running has nothing to do with sidewalks, or rubber tracks. I hated track at UF, and in High School. Running should be running.

agree wit CJ... Bolt is incredible, but what a jerk, eh?

Tie game, Gals In Bathing Suits!

Apparently, there is more than one game.

US Bathing suits win first game!

*takes off socks*

just. four. more. points.

The Chinese team isn't drinking water.

I think they're bots. one. more. point.

YESSSSSSSSss!!! WOOO HOOO!! WTG ladies!

Bathing Suits! Bathing Suits! Errr, USA!

Over to you, Middle America and West Coast!

My East Coast butt needs rest after wriggling all over during those games.

Same here. Long drive tomorrow. Hasta!

bikinis in the rain. how could it get better?

Yay, Kerry Walsh and Misty May! You GO, girls! Gold!!!

THAT's how it can get better, Wyo.

Looks like California's taking home another gold. WTG - May/Walsh!

I thought Bolt was an arrogantass his very first race. Jerk. Too bad the rest of us don't admire him as much as he does himself.

That's probably where he learned to run so well. If you're gonna be an ass, better be quick about getting away.

*channels Craaaaaig Ferguson* "weeel, he's screwed, then." then goes home.

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