LEGAL UPDATE FROM PULASKI COUNTY, VIRGINIA
Key Quote: During
a search, a maintenance worker was drawn by a strong, foul odor coming
from underneath the first floor. There he found the dead opossum
covered in fleas.
(Thanks to queensbee)
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July 02, 2008
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They just pretend to be dead . . .
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | July 02, 2008 at 04:44 PM
another treatment might be done over the holiday weekend
Boy do they know how to celebrate . . .
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | July 02, 2008 at 04:46 PM
No record of any lawyers being bitten by fleas. Then again, fleas have some standards.
Posted by: Not My Usual Alias | July 02, 2008 at 04:49 PM
"... another treatment might be done over the holiday weekend."
If they don't hammer out a flea bargain by Thursday night.
Posted by: Danny | July 02, 2008 at 04:55 PM
I think this one might be going to the supreme court.
Posted by: Recovering 24 Addict | July 02, 2008 at 04:56 PM
What do you call it when a flea escapes from a courthouse?
Posted by: CJrun | July 02, 2008 at 05:03 PM
They make great bass players when they hook up with Anthony and John and Chad.
Posted by: lil rascal | July 02, 2008 at 05:05 PM
Assistant County Administrator Robert Hiss?
Are we sure he's not a lawyer?
Posted by: JayP | July 02, 2008 at 05:12 PM
When these guys openned for Lynryd Skynryd, did they play Flea Bird?
Posted by: Erb's point | July 02, 2008 at 05:13 PM
Fleaing Prosecution
Posted by: CJrun | July 02, 2008 at 05:21 PM
I generally am less "drawn to" dead possums, and more "repulsed by" them.
BTW, we have a plentiful supply of possums in all phases of life up here in Cheese Country if y'all ever run short.
Posted by: padraig | July 02, 2008 at 05:25 PM
Aww crap. So that's where I left the viddles.
Posted by: Granny | July 02, 2008 at 05:45 PM
How ironic that a spammer posts on a story about parasites. Phil Ass Mansour fits somewhere between the fleas and the lawyers.
Posted by: MartiniShark | July 02, 2008 at 07:08 PM
right. gonna take financial advice from a 20 year old high school drop out. PU-leese. now somebody pass the possum n grits. oh, that isnt pepper?
Posted by: queensbee | July 02, 2008 at 07:28 PM
Hey Phil, do you take gas cards?
Posted by: CJrun | July 02, 2008 at 07:35 PM
Phil R Up, CJ!
Posted by: Siouxie | July 02, 2008 at 07:40 PM
Um...Martini?? ix-nay on the awyer-lay okes-jay. (El may be watching...shhhhhhh)
la la la
Oh and SMACKS Phil!
I can show you how to make money online by simply doing something you like, and know how to do. This is totally Legit
I got my own p0rn site too...sheesh.
Posted by: Siouxie | July 02, 2008 at 07:45 PM
Got it, Sioux - though I wasn't the only one.
Posted by: MartiniShark | July 02, 2008 at 07:57 PM
www.machetelove.com???
Posted by: Wayne Here | July 02, 2008 at 07:58 PM
LOL Wayne. I'm joking, of course. El knows we love her and all things *cough* lawyery ;-P
Besides, I'd never EVER compare fleas to attorneys. Fleas are ethical.
*runs and signs up for the witness protection program*
(I'm kissing, El...my very bestest attorney friend!!!)
Posted by: Siouxie | July 02, 2008 at 08:11 PM
oops...I'm also KIDDING, El!!
but if I hafta, I'll smoooch ya too ;-)
Posted by: Siouxie | July 02, 2008 at 08:12 PM
Hey, I've been catching grief for my beer affiliation so I think she can hack it.
Posted by: MartiniShark | July 02, 2008 at 08:14 PM
I hear ya. Lots of beer
snobsconnis conosserexperts 'round here. I like Bud Light. And Ying Yang ;-)Posted by: Siouxie | July 02, 2008 at 08:26 PM
Martini,
I think she can hack it.
I think you're (not your) confusing El w/ Siouxie...
Posted by: frodolives | July 02, 2008 at 08:40 PM
Justice is blind, but does she have to be itchy?
Posted by: insomniac | July 02, 2008 at 08:43 PM
*Snork* for CJ's joke. Not offensive, dopey and pun-awful. Just right!
Posted by: Cat R | July 02, 2008 at 08:54 PM
Cat, from your fingertips to my 5th Grade teacher's ears.
Posted by: CJrun | July 02, 2008 at 09:04 PM
*zips in*™
Yes, I am watching, and taking names. ;)
Posted by: Eleanor | July 02, 2008 at 09:13 PM
*hides*
tee hee...smooooooch, El!!
Posted by: Siouxie | July 02, 2008 at 09:36 PM
Wha - what?
*Loudly knocks over tower of empties by accident*
Eleanor! Hey, haven't seen you around in a while! So, how ya been. . .?
Posted by: MartiniShark | July 02, 2008 at 10:23 PM
did everybody go home?
Posted by: Wyo Cowboy | July 02, 2008 at 10:24 PM
smoooooch back at ya,Siouxie!
I'm around,Martini. Watching a lot of tennis and just hanging out.
How about you?
Posted by: Eleanor | July 02, 2008 at 10:31 PM
LTTG
1) *snork* at CJ's "fleaing prosecution"
2) Siouxie- "kissing El" is the kind of thing he was talking about
3)
4) WYYOOOOOOOOOO! (It had to be said)
5) Siouxie- just bought my plane ticket for the Hunt. If they change the date, you are going to have a houseguest anyway! ;)
Posted by: diverdowndoc | July 02, 2008 at 10:46 PM
I'll bet thosee clerks were a little ticked off.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | July 02, 2008 at 10:52 PM
I'm writing, watching some "Burn Notice", and blurking here. It's a full night.
Posted by: MartiniShark | July 02, 2008 at 11:02 PM
Howdy, blog-pardners! I'm home again and starting to get rested (not A-rested). I am so far behind on the blog posts I don't know if I'll ever catch up!
Posted by: ScottMGS | July 02, 2008 at 11:16 PM
Sounds like you lead a busy life, MS. ;)
*zips out*
Posted by: Eleanor | July 02, 2008 at 11:17 PM
Hi, El. Weather is nicer here (for those of us used to it) than in is in So.Fla.
Posted by: ScottMGS | July 02, 2008 at 11:20 PM
*raises one for Scott*
Welcome back! Thought maybe you were on the lam.
Posted by: MartiniShark | July 02, 2008 at 11:22 PM
Naw, couldn't find one, MShark.
Did get a sixer of Michelob Porter for my hotel room, though. Pretty good. Also had a Rum Runner and a Key Lime Colada in the Keys. It's a good thing that I can't find any Key Lime Coladas in San Diego (and don't tell me where I can get one in San Diego!).
Posted by: ScottMGS | July 02, 2008 at 11:43 PM
Working through a case of such porter right now. Enjoying it as well.
Posted by: MartiniShark | July 02, 2008 at 11:51 PM
happy birthday, dave!!!!
Posted by: insomniac | July 03, 2008 at 12:56 AM
*seconds insom*
Posted by: ScottMGS | July 03, 2008 at 01:14 AM
Happy Birthday to guy whose sense of humor is matched only by his hair.
Have Joy.
And Cheetos.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | July 03, 2008 at 02:51 AM
Happy birthday, Dave. Remember:
Keep your feet on the ground,
Keep reaching for the stars,
And until you get the one you want,
We hope you'll join us often on "Shebang."
Posted by: SW | July 03, 2008 at 03:46 AM
The bot ate my birthday wishes.
Anyway, Happy Birthday, Dave and thanks for all the fish.
Maybe if you give them a day or so the whole country can throw you a party.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | July 03, 2008 at 07:02 AM
Another Birthday? Man, that's a lot of spanking. Hide the Cricket bat!
Posted by: CJrun | July 03, 2008 at 07:05 AM
To our Commander In Chief.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | July 03, 2008 at 07:13 AM
Happy Birthday.
Remember: It's whose young you feel.
Posted by: micklespiffy | July 03, 2008 at 07:32 AM
Happy Birthday, Dave!
*puts out birthday brownies and coffee*
Posted by: Cat R | July 03, 2008 at 07:54 AM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DAVE!!
Thanks for all the laughs.
(We'll just forget about all the gross, pukable moments.)
Posted by: Punkin | July 03, 2008 at 08:00 AM
Dave,
When you are president, will you pass a law stating that people do not have to work on their birthday?
(I figured today was the best day to ask...
Happy Birthday)
Posted by: Erb's point | July 03, 2008 at 08:13 AM
as for that law...
We, of course, still want to get paid.
Preferably with gas cards.
Posted by: Erb's point | July 03, 2008 at 08:15 AM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DAVE!!!!
Here's to many many more booger joke filled years!!!
Posted by: Siouxie | July 03, 2008 at 08:15 AM
I brought the cake and the BEER!
Posted by: Siouxie | July 03, 2008 at 08:19 AM
Dave - When you blow out your candles, and then catch your breath, will you wish that, perhaps, Siouxie will finally get a chance to get posted this year?
;)
Posted by: Punkin | July 03, 2008 at 08:20 AM
*snork*
smartass*snork*Posted by: Siouxie | July 03, 2008 at 08:24 AM
Happy Birthday, Mr President. Thought you might appreciate this ...
Posted by: Steve Haller | July 03, 2008 at 08:26 AM
Happy Birthday Dave (and also Happy Birthday to my sister Robyn who turns 39 today.)
Posted by: Expat_Canuck | July 03, 2008 at 08:56 AM
Make a wish!
Posted by: SW | July 03, 2008 at 08:57 AM
Dave, I brought several packages of candles. I think there are a total of 80 candles. That's about right, isn't it?
Happy b-day!
Posted by: estrogen centrale | July 03, 2008 at 09:02 AM
Great gag, SW! I especially liked when Siouxie showed us her tattoo ... !
*dons machete-proof armor*
Posted by: Steve Haller | July 03, 2008 at 09:05 AM
But how could anyone call Dave someone "that no one has ever heard of"?
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | July 03, 2008 at 09:15 AM
"Sir! The Keyhole 14 satellite is reporting a bright flash over southern Florida, possibly Miami. Should I warn the Pentagon we have a possible nuclear detonation?"
"What's the date? Hurry, man!"
"July 3rd, Sir!"
"Ok, Ok, everyone stand down! It's only Dave Barry's birthday. They're lighting all the damned candles again."
Posted by: Hammond Rye | July 03, 2008 at 09:24 AM
Where is he?
Five more minutes, and then we're starting without him!
Posted by: Cat R | July 03, 2008 at 09:34 AM
Very funny, Steve (not Stevie) (eyeroll)
I actually liked that "gag" the FIRST time I saw it, when CJ posted it ;-P
Posted by: Siouxie | July 03, 2008 at 09:47 AM
Oops. That'll teach me to not read every post. Was it on this borad?
Posted by: SW | July 03, 2008 at 11:09 AM
Living just up the road from Pulaski, I can tell you that it could just have easily been a local resident..
Posted by: jon | July 03, 2008 at 01:11 PM